


The Chain

by reusabletears



Category: The Last of Us
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, F/M, Gen, Jealousy, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-19
Updated: 2020-08-05
Packaged: 2021-03-04 22:40:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 14
Words: 29,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25383955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reusabletears/pseuds/reusabletears
Summary: Ellie has returned to Jackson after the events of Santa Barbara and her mind is healing, slowly but surely. Ellie's sole focus is to earn back the trust of Dina and JJ through hard work and perseverance. When Ellie finally feels like she is getting her emotions under control, a person from Dina's past returns to Jackson. Will this ruin Ellie's chance at reunion?
Relationships: Dina/Ellie (The Last of Us), Maria/Tommy (The Last of Us)
Comments: 70
Kudos: 441





	1. Chapter 1

The hands around Ellie’s throat felt more comforting than her morning spent alone trying to paint. She had set up her easel and canvas on Maria’s deck as a desperate attempt to force herself to paint the Tetons. Late spring, early summer had the alluring mountains looking extra bright. The white tips were frosty and misty. But the canvas stayed blank and it’s area was so expansive. So white. So useless. The mountains were expansive too but not so useless. They meant something. _You can’t paint mountains anyway._

“Stupid.”

“Ms. Williams?”

The questioning male voice drug Ellie back into the present. John, her student, was straddling her. His hands were wrapped tightly around her throat. John must have seen her face; her thoughts probably looked like fear or sadness. _The class, right._ Ellie could feel his grip begin to loosen. Ellie was pissed at herself for daydreaming in front of her students, all in their late-teens. They were eager to patrol and protect Jackson; much like she had when she was their age. Students who probably heard the rumors about her violent past. Her role in the deaths and destruction of beloved Jackson residents. Joel. Jesse. Tommy. Dina. 

_Dina._ Thoughts of Dina soared forward and Ellie’s skin began to warm as her heart suddenly ached for the woman she had called her own. She couldn’t think of Dina without feeling her cold skin suddenly go warm and tingly. She had seen Dina by the stable before her earlier class. Dina had quipped, “don’t hurt them, Ellie” before climbing onto Japan and trotting off. 

_Fuck._

Energy surged through Ellie and she swiftly slipped her left hand through John’s arms. Her fingers, even the damaged ones, quickly cupped John’s thumbs where they were pressing in on her windpipe. She pulled her hand towards John, giving her throat enough space to take in a deep breath. Utilizing her right hand to grab John’s body as leverage, she pulled her legs forward and used them to grip John’s midsection and flip him onto his back. The movement broke John’s arms away, his shoulders hitting the ground hard and causing him to groan out in pain. Ellie pulled her new switchblade from her pocket, flipping out the blade, bringing it down towards his throat and stopping right before his windpipe. John cried out in fear and didn’t even bring his arms up to defend himself. A jolt of guilt surged through Ellie. 

“Once you have the upper hand with a human opponent, you must kill them quickly or you will find yourself as dead as John here.”

Ellie swiveled to look at the crowd of eight students who had created a semi-circle around John and herself. Faces of surprise, confusion, and disgust. Ellie felt her chest tighten. _They don’t understand._ On her way back from Santa Barbara, Ellie’s emotions had slowly begun to come back to her. Feelings she only remembers having before Joel’s death. When she used to only feel anger and emptiness, she now feels every emotion under the sun. 

“John, why did you loosen your grip?”

“I thought,” John sputtered, “you were scared. I thought I was hurting you.”

“Because I am your teacher or because I am human and not infected?”

“Uh..”

“Infected are easier to kill,” Ellie began, as she pushed herself off of John and offered her right hand to him. “Because infected aren’t human. They may look human but they are shells. Animalistic. You know to kill them quickly because they will always attempt to eat you. Humans may attempt to befriend you. They will always look desperate for life when they are close to death. If you give them any chance at life, then they will kill you just as quickly as any infected.”

Ellie pulls John fully to his feet, touching his shoulder and tries giving him a look of pride. “That’s it for today. Tomorrow afternoon is our next class and we will be working on sneaking up on Infected.”

The students all respond in agreement and begin to wander to the corner of the horse paddock; the place Ellie had chosen for her classes as it had the best view of the surrounding mountains. The mountains were her best friend. The mountains didn’t judge her. Ellie stayed rooted to her spot, breathing in the fresh air. Maria had given her a stupid self-help book a few days before. The book swears it will help Ellie reclaim herself through meditation and inward self-rejuvenation. The pages last night had asked her to be in the moment. _Be in the moment._

_Fuck this moment._ Ellie closed her eyes and tilted her head upward, trying her best to feel good about her new life. The life she had tried to start when she decided to come back to Jackson after wandering around for months; knowing that Dina was in Jackson. _Dina_ . Thoughts of the woman came streaming into Ellie’s mind, as they often did. Dina’s face when Ellie had returned to Jackson six months before. Dina’s mouth slightly open, face wrinkled slightly, eyebrows turned down in a mix of relief and anger. Dina’s eyes. The love Ellie remembered had never left Dina’s eyes. And that is when Ellie knew she could never leave again because even after all Ellie had done to Dina, Dina still loved her. _But she hasn’t forgiven me._ A long, lone sigh came out of Ellie’s mouth and she let it fill the space. All of the students had left the paddock and she was alone again. Controlling all her old emotions was a daily process that Ellie felt like she was losing today.

The sound of children screaming in joy brought Ellie back to the present. Ellie forced her eyes open and turned towards the sound, seeing the daycare in the distance and the kids playing on the outdoor jungle gym. _It’s finally time to go get JJ._ Happiness welled up in her chest. Ellie is allowed to pick him up from daycare whenever; one of the few joys Dina had granted upon her return. Maria refused to allow Ellie to go back to patrol yet and had coerced her into becoming a combat teacher for all the Jackson teenagers who would be needed to continue to keep Jackson safe. But Maria allowed Dina to patrol. Something that Ellie hated. Dina’s safety was one of her main concerns. But if she was ever going to get Dina to trust her again, she couldn’t let Dina or Maria know how she felt. 

Ellie walked to the corner of the paddock and grabbed her worn backpack; her only connection to her past. That and Dina’s bracelet. Her left hand reached out for it, feeling the leather slide through her thumb and forefinger. Dina’s eyes always glanced at the bracelet when they spoke and so Ellie refused to ever take it off again. A link. The chain. The chain she didn’t want to break. But she had left all of her other things at the Farm. A gesture she hoped would feel like moving on but as the days passed, it felt more like a flag she had placed to prove she would bring her family back there. She began walking, allowing more memories to flood in.

After three months of being back in Jackson, Dina had come to Ellie’s new home, the garage behind Maria’s house. Joel’s home and garage was granted to a new family who had escaped the seige of Butte, Montana. So many families had come here after a group of hunters took Butte by force; and Ellie was unfamiliar with so many of the new faces in Jackson. And she felt pangs of jealousy, knowing someone else was enjoying Joel’s home. When Dina had knocked, Ellie was in the kitchen attempting to make bread; a futile attempt at a new hobby that would keep her hands busy and mind off of the dark haired woman. Ellie opened the door, hands covered in dough and flour. Dina had come to tell her that if she was out on patrol and Ellie had finished her classes, she was allowed to pick JJ up from the daycare. Before Ellie could respond, Dina deposited an authorization card for JJ into Ellie’s flannel front pocket. Then she pushed a stray strand of Ellie’s hair behind her ear and walked away. 

The memory of Dina’s fleeting touch made her feel warm. Ellie instinctively grabbed the bracelet again. Then she looked up, finding herself in front of the daycare. Pulling the door open with an easy tug, Ellie walked up to Jenny, the desk clerk she had come to know well. Jenny was in her late 50s and one of the fixtures of Jackson. Ellie has always tried her best to be kind to Jenny; access to JJ was meaningful to her. 

“I am here to pick up JJ.” Ellie says curtly, the memory of Dina still affecting her. Jenny looks at her with confusion and question in her eyes. Ellie suddenly worries she was rude and blurts out. “Sorry, it was a tiring class. May I pick up JJ, please.”

“No, that’s not it Ellie,” Jenny responded. “I thought Dina had told you. Lee picked up JJ today.”

“Lee?”

“Yeah,” Jenny glanced down at the sign out sheet. “Lee Clark.” 

“Who the hell is he?” The anger Ellie was used to controlling suddenly bubbled up.

“She.” Jenny responded. “She is a Butte refugee but she used to live here in Jackson. She brought Dina here years ago.” Ellie felt a sudden pang of loneliness and the familiar anger deepened. _Lee? I thought Dina came to Jackson alone after Talia._

Jenny sensed her confusion. “I guess Dina didn’t tell you that. I am sorry, hon. Lee is a good woman so I am sure JJ is fine. Lee and Dina were close before Lee up and left her.”

_Close?_ _Left her?_ Jealous feelings flowed easily, interweaving tightly with the anger and confusion. Close enough that Dina had given her an authorization card for JJ. _Why would Dina do that?_ This was too much for Ellie.

“Yeah, uh, i’m sorry for bothering you Jenny.” Ellie says quickly as she turns to the door. “I probably forgot, that uh- Lee was supposed to get JJ.” 

Ellie left before Jenny had a chance to answer her. Ellie quickened her pace as she walked through town, hoping to make it to her garage without being seen. _Who the fuck is Lee?_ Ellie couldn’t stop thinking about it. Some woman from Dina’s past that Dina never told her about. As she rounds the corner to Maria’s 2-story sky blue house, she sees two figures on Maria’s porch. _Not now._ Ellie quickens her pace, seeing Maria’s back turned toward the street, hoping whoever the other figure was, that they wouldn’t recognize her as she moved along the fence. 

“Ellie?” 

_Tommy?_ The man’s voice caused her to break into a run. _What the fuck is he doing back?_ Tommy had left Jackson after Dina returned without Ellie. He told people he was done with living. _But obviously not._ Ellie feels a panic attack coming in, her eyes beginning to tunnel vision. Maria calls out to her but Ellie ignores it, not registering what Maria even says. Ellie flings her door open and slams it with the same vigor. Shaky hands lock the deadbolt as she turns, leaning against the door and sliding to the floor. Her face begins to feel hot, a pressure grows in her forehead and under her eyes. Tears. They suddenly flow out of her. Ellie hasn’t cried in forever. _Fuck._

The sobs overtake her and she tips over, pulling her knees to her chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! 
> 
> I noticed I did some formatting mistakes. I will be honest, I haven't wrote fanfiction in over 8 years so it has taken me a bit to get used to caring about things like formatting, haha.


	2. Chapter 2

It was eight pm before Ellie decided she ought to get up and eat something. She had a morning and afternoon class Monday through Friday, and couldn’t bear to mess up this opportunity if she was going to win Dina back. Somewhere in her panic attack, Ellie had moved to the bed. And now that she wanted to get up, she finally felt how wet her pillow was from all the crying.  _ Lee. Tommy. Lee.  _ Just thinking about them made her feel hopeless.

Tommy had left to die just as Ellie had done when she left for Santa Barbara. And even though Tommy had been angry with Ellie when he had left the farm that day, Ellie felt it was her fault that he was dead. “Not dead it seems.” Ellie muttered out loud to herself as she slowly kicked the sheets and comforter off of her body. 

She glanced downward, seeing her feet staring back. Ellie was wearing worn socks, skinny light-colored jeans, and a t-shirt. She found it outside of Santa Barbara; it was dark navy blue with the letters “FBI” adorning the front in a loud, bright yellow font. What a terrible idea to climb into bed in her sweaty clothes but she could barely think, let alone remember to remove her clothes. 

Ellie hadn’t had a panic attack since letting Abby go on the beach, months and months ago. It was strange for Ellie to think she had a control on her emotions, when something as easy as a name could send her spiraling.  _ Lee _ . Who could know Dina well enough to pick up JJ and Ellie not having any clue who they were? 

“She doesn’t trust you.” Ellie mumbles as she rolls out of bed.

Pulling her left arm inward with her right, Ellie begins stretching as she meanders into the kitchen.  _ Food. _ A quick glance around the cabinets and in the fridge let Ellie know all she needed to know. It was going to be crude mashed potatoes and broccoli again. While grabbing her ingredients and kitchenware, Ellie began to hum. The monotony of cooking was calming, almost meditative and she tried her best to push her insecurities out of her mind.

The water for the potatoes was just beginning to boil when Ellie heard footsteps on the gravel outside her door. The distant sound made her hyper aware and she instantly pulled her switchblade from her pocket, flipping the blade smoothly from the sheath and sneaking quickly near the door. A black figure appeared, lit by the porch light but not clear to Ellie’s eyes due to the curtains. Only sounds filling the space was the rumble of water and a sudden cough and swear word from the other side of the door.

“Ellie.” A knock emitted from the door.

It was Tommy. The man’s voice brought Ellie back from her state of prepared violence. The switchblade was closed and deposited as quickly as the usual guilt trickled down Ellie’s back. She reached forward and unlocked the deadbolt, pulling her door inward and seeing an older, almost calmer Tommy in front of her. 

“Tommy.” 

“Ellie.”

Ellie looked Tommy over. He had aged significantly since the farm, his hair a mix of blonde and grey, longer than she had ever seen it. Tommy had it in a long, low ponytail now but it seemed like he was caring for it more; like he suddenly cared about how he looked. Tommy’s face was clean shaven and more wrinkled, but his eye showed a mix of nerves and relief to be standing and looking at Ellie right now. He was dressed in his classic flannel stuffed into jeans with a sturdy pair of brown boots; his Texas belt buckle looked like it had been recently shined. Tommy’s hands fumbled together much like Ellie’s own when her nerves got the best of her. 

“May I come in.” Tommy chuckled nervously.

Ellie nods, moving out of Tommy’s way and watching the older man hobble in. His limp was still significant, present, even loud. A reminder of their failed quest to Seattle.

“Shit.” Ellie remembered the water, rushing over to fling the potatoes in and set the little chicken timer JJ had given her as a gift a few weeks back. Well, it was probably from Dina but JJ had it in his little bag when she picked him up from daycare. Wrapped in decorative paper and the attached note had read, 

_ “To Mommy,  _

_ Chickens go cluck, cluck. _

_ From, _

_ JJ” _

“I didn’t mean to interrupt dinner. I thought you woulda’ eaten by now.” Tommy brought her back to the present moment.

Ellie placed the timer back on the stove and began chopping up the broccoli. “I lost track of time.”

Tommy returned her answer with a grunt, still standing in the place she had left him.

“Have a seat, Tommy.” Ellie motioned to her lazy boy.

“Thank you.” 

The bubbling of the water and the sharp sounds of Ellie’s kitchen knife serenaded the two as they both racked their brains, trying to find the right words to fill the air with. Ellie didn’t think she would ever see Tommy again. And while his leaving was not her fault- something Maria constantly reminded her of, she still felt like it was. Ellie had badgered Tommy to go to Seattle in the first place and he would have never said or done any of it if she hadn’t pushed him.  _ I don’t deserve to see him, let alone talk to him. _

A quick clucking brought her back to the present; JJ’s timer was screaming for her to add the broccoli to the pot.

“That’s a fun timer.” Tommy mused.

“Yeah.” Ellie breathed, dumping the broccoli from the cutting board into the water. “Uh-” Ellie’s hands were back on the timer, setting a much shorter time. “JJ gave it to me.”

Tommy chuckled a deep chuckle. “JJ, huh? I can’t believe a toddler can give better gifts than I can.”

“Well, what can I say? My son has great taste.”

“Yeah,” Tommy turned as best as he could to look at Ellie. “Your son is pretty special.”

Ellie swallowed harshly, remembering her current predicament with Dina and JJ. Dina always referred to Ellie as JJ’s Mommy but Dina rarely stuck around in Ellie’s presence long enough for her to get a read on how Dina really felt about her. If Dina even wanted them to reunite or if she wanted Ellie to just be a separate parent, only picking up JJ from daycare. The last time she had a full conversation with Dina was during her first two weeks back in Jackson. Dina’s words were seared into Ellie’s memory.

_ “I think it’s best if we stay friends.” _

Ellie had hoped for more. But all she had was the deepened color of Dina’s eyes. The love and attraction that she saw burning. It had taken Ellie forever to recognize years earlier. It was outside of Boise, Idaho that Ellie first saw this look in Dina’s eyes. They had made camp and Dina was straddling Ellie in the moonlight. Dina had been unbuttoning Ellie’s shirt, kissing her skin after every button was un-clasped. Right before Dina reached Ellie’s jeans, she looked back up at Ellie, her breathing ragged. And that is when she saw Dina’s brown eyes darken; filled with love and feral attraction. It was there, under the Idaho sky, that Ellie chose to temporarily place aside her revenge in order to memorize Dina’s eyes. To memorize Dina’s body. 

The clucking again broke her from inside herself. Draining the veggies into the colander, Ellie coughed, trying to clear some of the emotions she was dragging up. 

“I couldn’t do it.”

Ellie turned toward Tommy, scrunching her face at his words. She shook the colander a few times before dumping it into a large bowl and grabbing the last bit of milk and butter she had. “Do what?” Ellie began, using her masher to combine her dinner.

“Kill myself.”

“Tommy- I...”

Tommy rose from the chair and slowly limped to the door. Ellie still had her back to him, seasoning her potatoes. Trying her best to not break down at his words.

“I want to make amends. I want us to spend time together and move on from Seattle. Knowing that you are alive- It’s the most alive I have felt since Joel died.” Tommy opened the door.

Ellie turned to face him. “I think- I would like to do that.”

Tommy smiled and hobbled back to Ellie grabbing the woman with both arms, releasing all the tension in the room. Ellie yelped in surprise as she hadn’t had a hug since she had returned. Instead of pulling away, Ellie leaned into it and took a deep breath, taking in Tommy’s scent. It was as comforting as she remembered. Tommy pulled back and patted Ellie on the head. “I will be at Maria’s-”

“She let you back into the house?”

“Spare room. Don’t get ahead of yourself, Ellie.” Tommy’s voice sounded more empty now. “Like I was saying, I will be at Maria’s so please come and see me. We can talk more.”

Ellie responded with a simple nod and watched Tommy leave, the sound of the door closing lightly. Relief washed over her as she turned back to her dinner, hopeful for reconciliation that she thought she had lost.  _ I wish Dina let me stay in her spare room. _

Dina. The woman’s form from the morning came floating back to Ellie. Dina was dressed in tight, dark jeans. A crisp, white button up that was only slightly tucked. Maroon jacket, clean and smartly cut. Dina’s hair was not in a ponytail but cascading down her shoulders, only partially pulled back to show her deep brown eyes and the beautiful features of her face. She had taken in Ellie’s body slowly, languidly before saying  _ “Don’t hurt them, Ellie.” _

“I won’t. Not like I hurt you.” Ellie whispered as she filled her plate.

A new knock startled Ellie and her door opened as she turned. Tommy was standing before her again.

“Sorry, I forgot that Maria wanted me to tell you to meet her at The Tipsy Bison after your classes tomorrow.”

Ellie sighed, “But that is when I pick up JJ.”

“Right, Maria knows that. Lee will pick up JJ tomorrow so you can go to the Bison instead.”

“Lee.” The venom and disappointment was apparent in Ellie’s voice.

“Lee is very capable Ellie, you should know that.” Tommy responds instantly. “Anyway, I will be seeing you.” The door shuts as quickly as it opened.

Ellie deposited her plate back onto her stove, no longer hungry.

“Who the fuck is Lee?”

  
  



	3. Chapter 3

The paddock was extra fragrant of horse manure Thursday morning. Sleep was elusive the night before as Ellie struggled to remember who Lee was.  _ Dina must have told me _ . The young woman’s memory had never felt so clouded; well, except for when it came to Joel after his death. She had forgotten what Joel's eyes looked like; his face only battered and bloody. It was somewhere in Nevada on her way back from California that she saw Joel vividly, standing in the bathroom doorway of the Wyoming Museum. The older man’s expression was full of amusement as Ellie contorted her face into funny shapes. He had looked so proud, so content. She missed Joel. 

Ellie felt tears begin to form as she opened her bag and pulled out wooden training knives and blindfolds; focused on making sure her classes got a lot of repetition in today. That's when she heard laughter near the stable; laughter that her soul knew anywhere. 

_ Dina. _

Ellie stood up and began walking quickly toward the fence line closest to the stable. As she did so, Dina rounded the far corner carrying JJ. Dina's hair was up in a ponytail today and her face bright and happy. Dina stopped by the billboard, turning as if someone was behind her. That's when a woman jogged into view, holding JJ's sleepy-time blanket and saying something to Dina that Ellie couldn't quite make out. Ellie walked more towards the corner of the paddock, dying to get a better view of the woman with Dina. The breeze blowing Dina’s indistinguishable words towards Ellie’s strained ears.

The unfamiliar woman was definitely in her 20s and tall, at least 5’10". Her hair was reddish-blonde and very short; the sides were cut neatly to her head with the top about three inches longer, styled in a messy faux-hawk. Ellie strained to see her features but as far as she could tell the woman was very fair-skinned and classically beautiful, almost handsome with defined cheekbones and a rugged jawline. She had an athletic build and carried herself much like Ellie did, a confident swagger of someone who knows their way around this post world landscape. She was wearing hiking style boots, tan cargo shorts, brown t-shirt, and a really worn out jean jacket. Ellie could tell that there were patches on the jacket but she had no clue what the patches were. And that is when Ellie finally noticed that the woman had a soft guitar case strapped to her back. A strange sight for morning-time in Jackson.

_ Is this Lee? _

Ellie was unable to stop watching the women, even as she heard her students gather in the paddock behind her. Dina took the blanket from the woman and handed it to JJ. Then she suddenly tossed him into the air, Ellie listened to him squeal happily. Dina caught him with such ease, bringing a grin to Ellie’s face. Ellie leaned forward and propped her elbows on the fence, not wanting to miss a chance at watching Dina interact with JJ. Dina then handed JJ to the woman, stooping to pick up JJ's daycare bag to hand it over as well. Once the woman took it, she caught Ellie's stare. The two looked at each other for a few seconds longer than was comfortable for Ellie and the woman abruptly looked away, saying something to Dina and pointing in Ellie’s direction.

Ellie felt a small surge of panic. Once Dina turned to see her staring she waved her hand, hoping to see Dina wave back. But instead, Dina turned to kiss JJ on the head before walking in Ellie's direction. The taller mystery woman started off toward the daycare with JJ, hugging him tightly and obviously talking with him. Ellie's palms began to feel sweaty as she watched Dina slowly walk her way, an almost flirty smile on the shorter woman’s face.  _ Keep it together, Ellie. Be cool. _

"Were you watching me, Ellie?" Dina's voice sounded like good ice cream tastes; smooth and sweet. 

"I'm sorry, I-" Ellie's face began to blush, embarrassed for staring.

Dina chuckles lightly before reaching out to touch Ellie's right arm, resting on the fence boards. "Don't apologize, I was teasing you."

"Oh." Ellie breathed in sharply, hyper aware that Dina had left her hand on her forearm, cupping it gently.

“I assume your classes are about to start?”

“Yeah, soon.” Ellie gulped, fearing Dina could hear her heart beating fast.

“I-” Dina’s voice dropped to a more sincere timbre. “I am proud of you. Your training will help those kids survive. And you do such a good job preparing them for the reality outside these walls.”

“I am trying my best.”

These words tumbled out of Ellie’s mouth; their double meaning not lost on either woman. The warmth of Dina’s thumb as it began to caress Ellie’s arm caused her to turn and look deeply into Dina’s eyes. She saw the brown orbs darken and couldn’t help but repeat,  _ I love you _ , over and over again in her mind; hoping Dina could read it. Dina’s eyes dropped, looking at Ellie’s lips before tearing herself away to look down at Ellie’s wrist.

“I know you are.”

Dina's hand lingered over Ellie's fern tattoo before slowly dropping down to the hamsa bracelet, tied around Ellie's wrist. "I love that you still wear this."

Ellie felt a strange satisfaction rise. "I wouldn't dare take it off again." Ellie was mentally referencing when she took the memento off in Santa Barbara; at the time she didn't believe she deserved Dina's luck. Or even Dina’s love.

Dina hummed pleasantly, never taking her hand or her eyes off of the bracelet or Ellie's wrist. "I want to see you, talk to you, just the two of us," Dina's words sounded like church bells in Ellie's head. "Sunday night, perhaps? JJ will be with Jesse's parents."

Ellie wanted to scream out a resounding yes but her mind was struggling with whether to ask about Lee and if that woman she just saw with Dina was Lee. But Dina wanted to see her and she didn't want to mess that up.

"Sunday sounds great. I mean, I am free all weekend so any day sounds nice."

"Maria hasn't told you yet, then?" Dina laughed.

"Told me what?" Ellie was out of the loop again, her frustration beginning to mount. "I mean I am supposed to see her later today."

"She will tell you then, don't worry." Dina removed her hand and began to back away. "I have to go on patrol now. See you on Sunday, Ellie. My place, six pm. Don’t forget."

"Six. Be safe out there."

"You too, teach." Dina grinned, pointing toward Ellie's waiting class. "Don't let me keep you from Jackson's youth."

And then Dina turned, quickly walking toward the stable. She left a ring of warmth around Ellie's wrist. "Fuck, she’s hot." Ellie breathed. Dina was going to be the end of her.

"You ready, Ms. Williams?"

"Yeah, sorry.." Ellie turned back, happier and better focused on her class. 

____________________________________________________________________

Ellie finished her last class as quickly as she could, hoping to get to the Tipsy Bison and figure out what Maria wanted. Her morning chat with Dina had left her so giddy that she rarely drifted off and could focus on teaching her students good movement skills. She grabbed her bag, pulling the zipper open and letting the students flow by her, each one dropping in either a blindfold or a training knife. Ellie thought of maybe even ordering a beer since the weather in Jackson was getting warmer and her throat could use a cool drink.

Ellie began walking by the daycare, a pang of sadness in her stomach since she couldn’t spend time with JJ. But she knew it was only temporary, surely she’d get to grab him tomorrow. If she could only figure out what everyone else seemed to know about Lee or what Maria wanted from her. As she strolled down the street, she started to hear a guitar in the distance; it was unfamiliar but oddly catchy.  _ Folk music?  _ She quickened her pace towards the Bison, hoping to see where the music was coming from. That’s when she heard a woman singing, gruff and raspy.  _ She’s good. _ Ellie could hear the song perfectly; whoever was singing knew how to enunciate and project her voice. This was a talent Ellie had been trying to improve back when she played.

**“** **Well my buckle makes impressions**

**On the inside of her thigh**

**There are little feathered Indians**

**Where we tussled through the night”**

It was the woman from earlier. She was sitting on a stool outside of the bison near the temporary outdoor patio that Seth set-up every year once the last snow thawed. Her jean jacket dropped haphazardly on the ground and her brown t-shirt sleeves rolled up showing her well muscled arms. The late lunch crowd was sitting around on mis-match tables and chairs, eating sandwiches and drinking beer. They were taking in this woman’s voice and the ambiance was calm, almost deliberate. The woman’s hair shook back and forth as she played; rasping out the lyrics with a bluesy tone.

**“** **If I'd known she was religious**

**Then I wouldn't have came stoned**

**To the house of such an angel**

**Too fucked up to get back home”**

_ This has to be Lee. _ Ellie felt almost jealous, watching the crowd of people moving their bodies methodically to the music. The lyrics were soulful and Ellie found herself trying to memorize them wondering if she could play it later.  _ Yeah, right. With what fingers. _ Ellie scowled slightly then hurried her steps, focusing her eyes on the double doors of the Bison. She needed to get inside to find Maria as soon as possible. 

**“Lookin' over West Virginia**

**Smoking Spirits on the roof**

**She asked ain't anybody told ya**

**That them things are bad for you”**

The woman’s voice was significantly quieter as Ellie entered, a blessing since Ellie was beginning to feel envious of the woman’s bravado. Her eyes scanned the bar landing on Maria sitting in a back booth. Maria waved her over.

“Hi, Ellie. How were your classes?”

Ellie smiled, “Good.” and scooted into the booth across from Maria. 

“Awesome. Would you like a beer?” Maria sounded stressed.

“Sure, if you will drink one with me.”

“Why not.” Maria turned. “Seth!”

The older man glanced their way, his own demeanor matching Maria. “What?”

“Two of your light brews. Cold ones, I don’t want the shit you just bottled.”

“Fine.” He grunted, not happy with Maria for some reason.

“You wanted to see me.” Ellie wanted to know so badly why she was here. She had just got into the swing of teaching the combat classes that she was unsure what Maria would want from her. For the past 6 months, Maria had done nothing but pressure Ellie to work hard at the combat lessons.

“Yeah, I want you to do a 2 day patrol. Starting tomorrow. You’ll leave around 7am and return around 7am on Sunday.”

“What?”

Seth deposited the beers with a clunk and returned to the safety of his bar.

“You heard me. A two day. You are going to take one of your students. I was thinking John, he seems the most promising.” Maria’s voice was even as she took a quick swig. “This could be colder.”

Ellie stared blankly at her bottle, wondering why Maria had a sudden change of heart. Ellie had been wanting to patrol since she returned to Jackson; her skills with infected and hunters were all she had. Maria had screamed at her, telling her that she was worth more than the violence she wielded. Ellie had never been told off as badly as that night; her confidence wrecked. Ellie didn’t think she could be a farmer, logger, or medic. Her brutality was her usefulness. She stared at her missing fingers for the rest of the night, wondering if there was even a place for her anywhere.

“But you said-”

“I know what I said, Ellie.” Maria exhaled and rubbed her temples. “I changed my mind. I need you to take John to Moose and check it out for me.”

“Why?” Ellie felt weird questioning the older woman.

“I am thinking we need to start a satellite settlement. Somewhere close to the mountain trails; somewhere we can keep a better eye on hunters and infected horde migration.”

“Butte.” Ellie suddenly understood. Maria was trying to get ahead of the trouble, in case the hunters who destroyed Butte were headed their way.

“We have settlements to the west but nothing north. I want to change that and I trust your opinion.” Maria took another drink. “Plus, I have been watching your classes. You do good work and John has potential.”

Ellie would rather take Dina but she knew better than to ask. Dina stayed close to Jackson because of JJ. Instead she took a sip, finding some confidence in the cool liquid. “I’ll do it. Do you need help gathering supplies?”

“No, I had Dina do it all last night. John will take Blizzard and you can take Timber. Your saddlebags are already ready, you just need to gather some clothes. I talked to John earlier and he is very eager.” 

“No wonder he was overachieving today.” Ellie chuckled, remembering John’s stealth attempts. 

“The boy has promise; keep an eye on him.”

Ellie nodded her reply. She then heard a new guitar riff as someone opened the double doors, the raspy voice entering the bar.  _ It’s now or never. _

“Maria?”

“Yeah.” Maria leaned back.

“Who is the woman singing outside?” Ellie tried to keep her voice even, she didn’t want Maria to get suspicious.

“Lee. I thought you already knew about her?” Maria leaned forward. “She used to live in Jackson as a child. She is a troubadour of sorts so I convinced Seth to let her play here for the lunch and dinner crowds. People like live music. I like happy people.”

Ellie again was lost.  _ Troubadour? What the fuck? What idiot would travel around this world just to sing. _ Ellie didn’t want Maria to know she didn’t know who Lee was.

“Right. Cool.”

“Alright. You should get home and get some rest. I will have John meet you at the stables in the morning.”

Ellie chugged the rest of her beer, trying to focus on Maria’s voice and not the bluesy tune seeping through the double doors.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Lee sings is "Feathered Indians" by Tyler Childers. 
> 
> I know it isn't a pre-outbreak song but Lee sounds terribly good singing it. In my mind, of course.


	4. Chapter 4

Ellie was happy to finally feel the warmth of the sun; most of the 6 hour ride was spent in the chill of the morning. Ellie and John had followed old world highway 191; nary a word spoken as Ellie was trying to keep an eye on all the high spots. 191 follows the Snake river north through the valley; The Grand Tetons to the west. Moose is a little more than halfway from Jackson to Jackson Lake. If Ellie had been making the plans for an outpost, she would have chosen Elk or Moran. But Maria calls the shots around Jackson and Ellie prefers to follow her instructions to a tee. 

"What a small mountain."

John's words pulled Ellie's head east towards a small butte. She pulled her map from the forward saddle bag and studied the route they were on. 

"It's called Blacktail Butte." Ellie mused. "Our turn off to Moose should be close to the end of this, hopefully when we start to see the snake river better."

John smiled, nudging Blizzard to more of a trot so he could climb a small hill close to the Butte. "This area is so beautiful." John’s voice was full of admiration and innocence. 

"Yeah," Ellie sighed. "Reminds me of my old farmhouse outside of Jackson. The whole valley is gorgeous."

"You lived in a farmhouse outside the walls?" John pulled Blizzard closer to Timber, suddenly more interested in talking.

"Yep."

"Alone? Or did you have a husband or something?"

Ellie laughed. "How old do you think I am, John?"

The boy's face went pale. "Uh. Like- 28 maybe? I mean 25- no..."

"I am barely 22." Ellie chuckled, scanning the valley hoping to see the Snake river bend closer to their location. "And husbands, well men for that matter, aren't really my thing."

John seemed to relax at that statement. "So you are kind of like Lee, then."

The mention of that woman's name sent Ellie's mind into motion. Ellie couldn’t get through half a day without hearing her name.  _ Like Lee? _ "What do you mean by that?"

"Oh. Well Lee lived in Butte, Montana when I did. She would come over to my house to teach my dad how to play guitar. She's like 25 to 27 and she prefers women too. My mom tried to set her up with my older brother, which didn’t go so well. Maybe you should talk to her?" John teased. 

_ Into women?  _ Jealousy climbed Ellie's back. The previous morning when Ellie saw Lee jogging toward Dina, JJ's blanket in her hand. The way she carried JJ lovingly to the daycare. Ellie instinctively clenched her teeth.  _ Were Dina and Lee a thing when they were kids? Were they a thing now?  _ Ellie began to feel sick. Timber reacted to her letting go the reins in order to grab at her stomach. The horse slowed to a stop.

John turned Blizzard with a look of worry crossing his face. "Ms. Williams? You don't look so hot."

Ellie gulped, trying to keep these feelings at bay. She surely didn't want to be out here with John right now but Ellie had to tough it out. "I guess my breakfast doesn't agree with me."

"That's because Seth cooks with anger instead of love."

Ellie sighed, looking over at the bemused youth. He had at least bought her lie. "I wouldn't eat there if I could cook for myself."

Ellie motioned for Timber to begin trotting again and resumed scanning the land under the Tetons. But the sick feeling wasn’t going away and Ellie felt a familiar anger begin to build inside her. She needed to talk to Dina. Ellie couldn’t bear the idea that she may be interpreting Dina’s actions or even Dina’s eyes incorrectly. It would mean Dina had moved on.  _ Moved on with Lee. _ But it didn’t stop her from asking John about the redhead.

“Did Lee come up with your group during the siege of Butte?”

John was silent. This question was far more personal than Ellie meant for it to be and she regretted putting the boy on the spot. 

“No. She stayed behind to make sure everyone got out. I think she only made it to Jackson a month ago.”

“Interesting.” Ellie mused. She saw the snake river more clearly now and what looked like an old road, snaking left toward the Tetons. “I think this is our exit.”

__________________________________________________________________

The bridge across the snake river was still standing and Ellie couldn’t be more grateful. She glanced up at the sky, thinking it had to be about 4 pm. She had deliberately traveled slow; memorizing the terrain so that she could suggest places to build scout camps. These were common west of the city and even though Maria hadn’t asked for that, she wanted to be thorough. John didn’t seem to care about the slow pace and was probably just excited to leave the walls; Ellie wasn’t sure bringing him was the best idea but everyone needs to start somewhere.

“Ms. Williams, look.” John was pointing to the left.

Ellie’s eyes followed his finger to a huge log building with a full glass front.  _ Good building to keep an eye on the road.  _ “Please John, call me Ellie. Let’s check it out.”

“Ok.”

She clicked to Timber and they followed an overgrown road up to the building. It’s huge stone chimney was crumbling but the glass walls looked intact. Once Ellie was closer, she saw a sign that read “Craig Thomas Discovery and Visitor Center”. Ellie and John rode up to the door, dismounting their horses in the cover of the vestibule. “Tie the horses up to the rack over there. I will try to figure out a way in.”

Ellie tried the front door, expecting it to be locked. The sliding doors opened with a gentle pull putting Ellie on high alert. “The front door is open, John. Be on alert.”

Ellie pulled her pistol and began clearing the building. “Stick close to me.” She whispered, glancing to John’s holster causing him to remember to pull his weapon. 

Clearing the building was tense; the place was in decent condition and looked like someone had been camping inside of it recently. They cleared the first floor, finding nothing of importance. The two made their way to the second floor looking in each room, listening intently. As they made their way to the back, Ellie spotted a filing cabinet blocking what looked like a janitor’s closet. She glanced at John who was startled to be under his teacher’s gaze and he ran into a wooden bench in the hall. The noise echoed, causing a sudden scream and rumble coming from inside of the janitor’s closet. Ellie knew what that meant.

“Shit. Sorry.” John whispered.

“It’s fine, I think it’s stuck in there.”   
  


“What are we going to do?” John relaxed, letting his gun drop to his side.

“Kill it.” 

Ellie snuck down the hall, clearing each room until the closet. She tested the weight of the cabinet. “You want to do the honors?”

“I don’t know about that, Ms. Williams…”

“Why the hell not? You need the experience.” Ellie suddenly knocked on the door, causing a loud screech and the infected to throw its body against the door. “I don’t see any spores coming from the gaps. Sounds like a runner. Probably locked in here in the past year.”

“Why would someone do that?” John’s voice trembled.

Ellie took in a deep breath. “Not everyone can kill someone they love. Get ready, I am going to push this cabinet out of the way.”

John nodded and pulled his gun up, ready. Ellie squatted, clasping the filing cabinet and she began to lift. It was heavy but she was able to topple it out of the way. She grabbed the handle and motioned to John with 3 fingers. 2 fingers. 1 finger. A fist, and she pulled down the handle. A scream emitted from the closet and a male runner shot out. 

Two shots and the runner ended up on the floor, screaming no more. 

________________________________________________________________________

It was almost 2 pm the next day. Ellie and John had set up camp inside the visitor center. Ellie and John spent the entire day exploring Moose. Moose was definitely not a town like Jackson; she’d compare it more to a campground. There were a decent number of cabins but the general store had caught on fire at some point and the Ranger’s Station had seen much better days. Ellie had sketched out the layout and written down most of the information Maria needed into her notebook. She had also found some trail maps and brochures in the visitor center. Maria would be happy. The two just had one more place to check, the chapel she had seen on the map.

“Alright John,” Ellie wiped her head. “Let’s go check the chapel and then we can go back to the camp and get some rest. I want to be back in Jackson by mid-morning tomorrow.”

“Yes, Ms. Williams.” 

“It’s Ellie.”

The two climbed the path. Ellie looked off toward the Tetons, feeling like the mountains were staring at her. She shrugged off the feeling as her emotions had been all over the place this week. Ellie was eager to ask more questions about Lee but it seemed John was still rattled from killing the runner the previous day. Ellie had spent most of the evening consoling him; she guessed he wasn’t really cut out for this kind of work. John had never killed anything before and he was just passionate about the combat courses because he was bored.

“Are you feeling better today?” Ellie asked suddenly.

“Not really.”

“Ok.”

“I mean,” John sighed. “I don’t think this is gonna work out.” 

Ellie mock scoffed, “Are you dumping me?”

“What?” John stopped, the shock evident on his face.

Ellie had a nice full body laugh and motioned toward the chapel, they were almost to the front door. “You are too easy to tease.”

“You joke a lot for someone so serious.” John followed her to the door.

“You think I am too serious?” Ellie stooped to look into the windows, this chapel was tiny. It was only one room, it could probably fit 15-20 people max.

“I mean, you never make jokes in class.”

“Well, I am teaching you all how to kill. I don’t think that is a laughing matter.” Ellie tried the door, feeling it give. Another open door, she was starting to get a funny feeling. 

“You are right.” John pushed by her, entering the chapel. The room was decently sized, still holding its huge pews and pulpit. But the large window behind the pulpit was missing; the mountain hills looked like they were encroaching in on the service. “Maybe I should ask Lee to teach me how to play guitar.”

“She taught your father, right?”

“Yeah.” John wandered closer to the pulpit.

“Does she have family?” The words fell out before Ellie had a chance to think them over.

John went behind the pulpit, leaning forward and sighing. “My Dad asked her the same thing. She told him that she did but that they either left her or she left them.”

“Hmm.” Ellie responded.  _ I understand that. _

“Lee didn’t talk much; she mostly sang. On the street, in the tavern, at local dances. She would also leave Butte for years at a time. Most of the residents felt bad for her.” 

A shot suddenly rang out and Ellie instinctively hit the floor. “John?!”

No answer. Ellie crawled toward the pulpit, seeing blood beginning to pool on the floor. 

“John?!” Ellie was frantic.

“Ellie…” John replied weakly. 

Ellie pulled herself to the young man, finding his elbow blown out and bleeding rapidly onto the wood planks. _ Probably a sniper rifle; and whoever shot him was a terrible shot. Fuck me. _ Ellie reached across John’s body, un-doing his canvas belt and ripping it from his body. “I knew I should've grabbed my rifle.” Ellie spat.

“Fuck, my arm.”

“I know. I am going to use your belt as a tourniquet. We need to stop the bleeding.”

Ellie glanced around the chapel, seeing a thick stick close to the window. She rolled and grabbed it, breaking it in two. She felt the sturdier side of the stick, testing its strength as she crawled back to John. 

“It hurts.”

Ellie wrapped the belt around his upper bicep, pulling it taut and notching it through the fabric with force. She then slid the stick inside and twisted it, using the opposite side of the canvas to steady the stick. “This will continue to hurt but it will keep you from bleeding out. Can you stand up?”

“I don’t know.” John groaned, holding his forearm.

Ellie looked around;  _ nowhere to hide _ . So she began pushing John closer to the pulpit, depositing him underneath it as best she could.

“Stay here. I need to figure out who shot you.”

That’s when they heard it; a vehicle. It was coming up the road to the chapel. Ellie grabbed John’s pistol out of his holster and deposited it into his hand. 

“If one of those fuckers comes around here, shoot them in the fucking face.”

John nodded as Ellie pulled her shotgun off of the side of her backpack and chambered a round.

“Let’s do this.”


	5. Chapter 5

Ellie heard the car stop at the crest of the hill. The chapel had a fence and a small arch for a gate, so she knew whoever was in the vehicle had to get out before approaching. She turned around and stood, quickly jumping through the open window. Ellie wasn’t immediately shot at so she assumed whoever had shot John was not watching. She quickly moved to cover and pulled her binoculars from her backpack. She scanned the area where the shot came from, noticing what looked like a cabin in the hills maybe 1200 yards out.  _ Damn it. _ The cabin was small and the front window was broken. This must be where the sniper shot John from. 

"So you think you killed him?" A voice stated, coming from in front of the chapel.

Ellie's jaw tightened. She followed the brush around the right side and laid prone; the brush giving her perfect cover and view of the vehicle. It was a dark green jeep and four men were inside. One of the men was standing in the backseat, using the roll cage as stability and looking around the chapel. This man was skinny with long, dark black hair. He was wearing black combat style pants and a black bulletproof vest.

A flash overtook her eyes and she was back in Santa Barbara, hanging upside down from the trap. Two figures walking toward her.  _ Abby.  _ But it wasn't; it was a man, his vest seared into Ellie’s mind. A sharp pain shot through Ellie's side where the branch had entered. She closed her eyes and her breathing rapidly increased. 

"I definitely killed him. I saw his head pop after I shot. Blood sprayed everywhere, man." The long haired man said with confidence.

Ellie tried to still her breathing, she needed to be in control of this situation. John was too inexperienced to deal with this. She glanced down at her wrist, taking in the shape and design of Dina's bracelet. She traced the outline of the hamsa with her eyes, paying attention to her own breathing. Dina's words from Seattle repeating loudly in her mind:  _ "It's for good luck." _ Ellie hummed lightly and then rolled her shoulders, bringing her focus back to the task at hand. The driver's side door opened, and a short but stout man exited the jeep.

"Didn't you see the redhead too?"

"Yeah, man. Right down my scope. The wood thing blocked me from getting a good shot on her." The long haired man jumped from the jeep, his feet hitting the ground with a thud. 

A third man exited from the rear of the jeep, bald and athletic. His voice sounded deep, "Peter is going to suck our dicks dry when we bring that redhead bitch's body back to the lake."

"You're fucking nasty, Nate." The final man pushed open the passenger side door, stepping out to place a white cowboy hat on his head. 

Ellie begins to assess her options; and there wasn’t much to choose from. She glanced around the brush, hoping to find something to toss to the side of the fence closest to her, praying only one man would follow. But there was nothing useful in sight.

"I just can't believe we found her. This was only supposed to be a scouting trip to see how far out Jackson keeps their lookouts." Cowboy hat chuckled, pulling his pistol out of his holster. "Maybe Peter will reconsider trying to take Jackson now and we can move toward Cheyenne or Missoula."

Ellie heard the man they called Nate sneer, "We wouldn't have to take Jackson if you and Slime had watched the bitch like you were supposed to. We'd still be in Butte, enjoying actual electricity."

"Go fuck yourself, Nate."

"Fucking come over here and say it to my face, Steven."

"Both of you stop." The bald man yelled, walking to stand between the two. "Butte was burned to the ground. You two scabs crying ain't gonna change it. Now let's go see if the bitch is in here or not." 

"I'll chill by the Jeep." The long haired man said, pulling his sniper rifle from the jeep and leaning it against the side. “I already killed one of em’.”

"Fine. Nate! You follow along the fence line, Stevie and I will look in the chapel."

Nate pumped his shotgun and walked towards Ellie’s hidden position. Ellie pulled out her switchblade and pushed herself up to a crouch, using the brush as cover. Nate reached where the fence stopped and the brush began, stepping around it coming inside the chapel grounds. Ellie used this to her advantage, circling around behind him. Once he stepped closer to the brush, straining to look inside, Ellie leapt forward grabbing the man's mouth heavily with her left and stabbing the switchblade expertly into his windpipe with her right. The familiar gurgle of blood in his throat was accented by a sharp intake of air as Ellie removed the blade and stabbed it in again. Hot blood flowed over her fingers as she dropped him gently to the ground. His mumbled choking turning into silence. 

Ellie glanced up, seeing the bald man and Steven trying to open the chapel door.  _ John.  _ But the door refused to budge.  _ John's a quick learner. _ Ellie clambered over the fence, moving towards the jeep. 

"I thought this door was open when we checked it yesterday?"

"It was you idiot. They are obviously inside. Stay here while I check around the back." The bald man groaned, walking off to the left in order to circle the building.

Ellie took this as her chance and she quickly shuffled towards the jeep. Long haired man was opening a bottle of whiskey and sliding down the side of the jeep to sit on the ground. Ellie waited until he brought the bottle to his mouth before rushing him. She grabbed the base of the bottle, slamming the glass hard into the man's face. Then stabbed her switch blade firmly into his jaw, hearing the small bones and tendons crunch on impact. The man shouted out in pain before she quickly brought the knife out and the back in, this time into his windpipe, silencing him for good.

"Kyle?"

Ellie pulled her pistol and rushed toward the fence, seeing Steven trot up the trail back toward the Jeep. She trained the gun on his head and pulled the trigger twice. His cowboy hat and blood flew backwards in the air as the man crumpled to the ground.

Before Ellie can move, new shots ring out from the back of the chapel. She begins running as the shots keep coming, one after the other. By the time she rounded the corner, the shooting had stopped and she saw the bald hunter splayed out in the dirt, riddled with bullet holes. "John?"

No response. Ellie walked carefully to the empty window. As she peered in, she saw the barrel of a pistol staring back at her so she ducked, hearing the click of an empty gun. She knew John was still alive.

"It's me, don’t shoot!"

"Ellie?" John's voice was panicked.

"It's over John. We got them all." Ellie stood back up, her eyes focused on a ghostly white John. Shock was plastered all over his features as he tried to cradle his injured arm. Ellie crossed over to the dead man, patting him down. She noticed his black t-shirt had a painted United States flag with a diagonal line through it. Ellie committed the design to memory, reminding herself to sketch it into her journal later. She checked his cargo pants and found a folded up map of Wyoming, marked up with a marker.  _ Bingo.  _ She quickly deposited the treasure in her backpack.

"I shot him."

Ellie pulled herself up and crossed the window sill into the chapel, stooping down to touch John's shoulder.

"Right in the fucking face." Ellie grinned, trying to make the boy feel better.

"I want to go home."

"Me too, kid. Let's get you up."

__________________________________

Ellie's eyes were strained as she looked at Dina's bracelet, her left hand slowly stroking the leather strands. Her body was screaming for sleep but the hard chair and florescent lights of the clinic were not conducive for rest. She had packed up the camp and forced John to ride Blizzard all the way back to Jackson that night. Ellie knew it was her only chance at saving him. Thankfully, it was clear and the moon was almost full, allowing for Ellie, and the two horses, to easily navigate and bring John back home safely.  _ But he lost his arm. _ Ellie scowled. The doctor on duty when they arrived had immediately told them it had to come off. 

The door to the waiting room opened, a slight creak in the hinge pulled Ellie's eyes up. Maria entered, expressionless. Tommy and a woman Ellie didn't recognize followed. Ellie’s eyes met this woman’s eyes, she had been crying. 

"Ellie." Maria said softly.

Ellie stood, suddenly feeling out of place.

"John?" The unknown woman asked. Her voice soft but cracking under the pressure of the air in the room.

"He's stable. He is sleeping in room number 3-" Ellie coughed, her throat was suddenly dry. "Down the hall there."

The woman walked toward the hall, stopping when she was next to Ellie. She reached out a hand and touched Ellie’s shoulder. "Thank you for bringing him home alive."

The woman walked away before Ellie could find words to respond. The gesture was nice but it didn't squelch the anger the trip had bubbled up inside her. The job wasn’t supposed to go south.

"Ellie, we need to talk. Room 1 should be free."

The trio walked into the room silently, Maria closing the door behind them. Ellie decided to walk by the bed to sit on the wide window sill, letting her feet dangle.

"What the hell happened?" Tommy asked, placing his hands onto his hips.

"We went to Moose, like Maria asked." Ellie grabbed her book-bag and pulled her journal and the hunter's map out, letting the bag slip to the floor. "It's pretty much a large campground. When we were checking out the chapel, a hunter shot John."

"How did they know y'all were there?" Tommy sounded exasperated.

"They were in a pretty well hidden cabin on a ridge; I didn't spot it until after John went down. The hunters drove to the chapel after they shot him- I am pretty sure they thought he was dead. I killed them and immediately brought John back to Jackson."

Maria stepped forward, "Why were the Flags there?"

"Flags?" Ellie was confused.

"John told the Doctor that the hunters were Flags. They are the group of fuckers who attacked Butte." Tommy said as he sat on the bed, pushing his bad leg out at a more comfortable angle. 

"Right, they mentioned they attacked Butte," Ellie held the map out to Maria. "Their leader, Peter, sent them out to scout how far out Jackson's lookouts are. They only shot at us because they thought I was some redhead who torched Butte to the ground."

Maria and Tommy looked at each other.

"What?" Ellie asked.

“Nothing.” Maria responded.

“It’s not nothing.” Ellie felt her anger rise. “What is going on? I feel like every time I talk to someone they know a hell of a lot more than I do.”

“Ellie, it's just-” Tommy began.

“It’s just what!” Ellie’s voice rose, her hands beginning to shake. “Fucking tell me what’s going on? I want to help. Let me fucking help!”

Maria sighed, rubbing her right hand against her forehead. “The Flags are a large hunter group we have been watching for a long time. They want to take a settlement that has good defenses and electricity. They tried to take Jackson a year or so before you and Joel first arrived. We beat them back pretty severely and they haven’t come near the walls since. But then they hit Butte.”

“Did you know I may run into them?” Ellie seethed.

“Honestly? No. We thought they would lick their wounds a little longer.” Tommy said. “I saw their numbers on my way back to Jackson. 80 to 100 strong, all up around Yellowstone. Maria just thought you would do a good job collecting information about Moose; we wanted to send a group to watch them.”

  
Ellie felt her blood begin to cool and her shoulders relax. There was no reason to be mad at Maria and Tommy, they didn’t want to worry Ellie with this high level stuff. But she still felt the pain of being left out.

“I am sorry we kept you out of the loop. We know what kind of stress you are under but that’s not a good excuse.” Maria stepped toward Ellie, placing a hand on her shoulder. “And, unfortunately I am going to need you to go back up there. We got to see what they are doing and honestly, you are one of the only people I trust.”

“Ok.”

“Then get some rest. Maria and I will look over the map and your notes. Get a game plan going. You’ll probably need to head out tomorrow morning.” Tommy stood, taking a step to get his balance. The man reached forward, grasping Ellie’s shoulder and squeezing. “Thank you for bringing John home. His mother lost her husband to the flags; she didn’t deserve to lose a son.”

  
Maria and Tommy then left Ellie in the room alone. Ellie stood, feeling the exhaustion take over her body. Ellie needed to get back to the garage.  _ Dina. _ Right, she had plans to see Dina tonight. She looked up at the clock, 11 am. She had time to rest but was she ready to talk to Dina after having a weekend like this?


	6. Chapter 6

Ellie's eyes flung open as her body took in a deep breath.  _ What time is it? _ She was lying on her stomach, in her bed, trying to blink the exhaustion away. It took everything in her to tilt her head so she could see her bedside clock.  _ 4:34 pm _ . Ellie smiled, she hadn't overslept her date with Dina.  _ It's probably not a date. _ The girl groaned and flipped herself over, rubbing her eyes. She needed to take a shower.

Her feet made small pattering noises as she walked, stripping off her clothes; the ones she forgot to change after her experience in Moose. The UCLA t-shirt was probably ruined as the blood on it was caked in and dry. Ellie's head turned towards her almost full trash can, her right arm tossing the shirt in its direction. It missed by a long shot.

The running water was warm; the perks of having a water tank on the sunny side of the garage. Ellie let it flow over her as she thought about Dina and what the smaller woman wanted to talk about. She had barely had any time to muse over why Dina suddenly wanted to set a date to see her. That's when it hit Ellie;  _ Lee _ . Maybe Ellie had been misinterpreting Dina this entire time. When she had returned from Santa Barbara, Dina had explicitly told her they were going to only be friends. And it's not like Dina has been around much to do anything with her.  _ But she touches you. She looks at you the same way she always has. Her eyes.  _ But Dina was a flirtatious personality; well known for being friendly and caring. 

The revelation made her sick. She placed her hands on the tub wall, trying to breathe normally. All the conversations about Lee coming together in a tangled web. All signs pointing to Dina never telling Ellie about her history with this woman. People had said they knew each other as kids.  _ Why wouldn't Dina mention a woman she had known for so long that she trusted her to watch JJ. _ Ellie felt like she was going to explode.

"I need to talk to Dina."

Ellie quickly turned the water off and grabbed for her towel. She focused on her thoughts, trying to tell herself that if Dina was in love with Lee that she shouldn't stand in the way. Dina deserves more than some messy has-been who is only good at killing people.

__________________________________

Ellie had gotten ready quickly, leaving her house at exactly 5:15. It was only a ten minute walk to Dina's but she couldn't bear to wait until 6. She had to talk to Dina. She needed to make sure she was able to tell Dina it was ok to move on; even though that same idea broke her own heart.

Once Ellie was 3 houses down, she heard a guitar in the distance. The tune was snappy, twangy; it sounded like the country music Joel was fond of. The tune thumped as the guitarist picked, a melody that sounded a lot like Ellie’s own beating heart. As Ellie came closer, Lee's voice filled the air.

**"Last night I dug your picture out from our old dresser drawer.**

**I set it on the table and I talked to it till four."**

Ellie reached Dina's small, two-story house and noticed the living room window was open, letting Lee's voice mix with the afternoon breeze. Ellie's limbs began to feel heavy but she was determined to speak to Dina so she walked up to the porch.

**"I read some old love letters right up to the break of dawn.**

**Yeah, I've been sittin' alone, diggin' up bones."**

Ellie climbed the porch glancing over at the porch swing. She saw Dina's tan jacket on top of Lee's jean jacket with the patches, both slung over the cushions. The jackets looked like they were holding each other and it made Ellie’s mouth go dry. She felt her chest squeeze, the pain of all her realizations coming down over her like a cold waterfall.

**"Then I went through the jewelry and I found our wedding rings**

**I put mine on my finger and I gave yours a fling"**

Ellie swallowed, bringing her right hand up to knock on the door. Her eyes glancing at the bracelet. She had lost so much leaving the farmhouse for Santa Barbara. She had barely said goodbye. And maybe now she knew what her biggest loss of all was.

**"Across this lonely bedroom of our recent broken home.**

**Yeah, tonight I'm sittin' alone, diggin' up bones."**

Ellie knocked, hoping it was loud enough to be heard over Lee.

**"I'm diggin' up bones, I'm diggin' up bones,**

**Exhuming things that's better left alone.**

**And I'm resurrecting mem'ries of a love that's dead and gone.**

**Yeah, tonight I'm sittin' alone, diggin' up bones."**

Ellie knocked harder, finding herself tired of hearing Lee sing. The guitar and singing stopped and Ellie could hear her place the guitar down on the wood floor. Footsteps thumping to the door, a creak as it was opened, and suddenly she was standing face to face with Lee.

"Ellie?" Lee said with surprise, the redheaded woman's speaking voice was higher than her singing one but just as raspy. "I thought you were coming at six."

"Yeah-" Ellie began, taking in the woman's state of comfiness. Lee was in a white t-shirt and baggy grey sweatpants that were cut into shorts. Her socks were white, long, with blue stripes; like the players on baseball cards.  _ Lee definitely lives here. _

"Nice to finally meet you," Lee stuck out her right hand, "I've heard a lot about you."

That admission stung since Ellie knew next to nothing about Lee. Ellie didn't want to shake hands. "Is Dina here?"

"Sure is." Lee sounded more serious as she dropped her hand and stepped back. "Let me call up to her, I think she is getting ready." 

Lee backed away from the door and walked to the stairwell, bounding up 3 steps before calling out, "Dino! Ellie is here!"

_ Dino?  _ This was becoming too much for Ellie to deal with.

"She's early! Tell her I will be down in a bit!" Dina's voice sounded anxious.  _ Maybe coming early was a bad idea. _

Lee turned and looked at Ellie, knowing full well the shorter woman heard Dina's reply. "Want something to drink?" Lee crossed toward the door of the kitchen. "Seth pays me with one word answers and home-brewed beer."

"No."

"Alright." Lee stopped and turned awkwardly to the couch, picking her guitar back up and sitting back down. "Dina told me you play. Do you have a favorite genre? Or maybe a favorite song? Dina told me you like A-Ha."

The anger inside Ellie intensified. She did not want to be standing here with Dina's new lover talking about her inability to play a guitar. Ellie flexed her left hand, her missing fingers becoming more apparent. Lee’s eyes trailed down, looking at the same missing finger. The redhead’s expression turned to a frown.

"Fuck off."

"Hmm." Lee began picking the guitar to the tune of Hotel California; one of Joel's favorites. "Can't say I am familiar with that one."

Ellie couldn't do it anymore. She'd face Dina after the trip to Jackson Lake; if she even came back to Jackson at all. Her legs turned her body and she power-walked out of the house. Slamming the porch door behind her with all her might. As she reached the street, she kicked Dina’s mailbox, feeling the pain of the action shoot up her leg. But she’d rather feel that pain then be in the same room with Lee right now.

________________________________

The walk back to the garage was terrible. Ellie’s eyesight was tunneling and her body hyper aware of any people that were milling about. Ellie was almost to Maria's street when she heard Dina calling to her.

"Ellie! Ellie, wait!"

Ellie slowed, anger and disappointment brewing inside her. She was unable to stop her body from trembling as she slowly turned to see Dina running towards her.

"Ellie, what the fuck?" Dina's voice was pissy. Ellie was not in the mood to be chastised. She turned to keep walking. "Don't you walk away from me, stupid."

The pet name stung. The reminder of the teasing banter that they created through friendship and into their old relationship. She always found it endearing and even with her emotions clouding her mind, she wanted to smile at the mention of it.

"I'm sorry." Ellie breathed.

Dina walked up behind her, crossing to stand in front of her. "Why did you leave?"

The question had a double meaning but Ellie knew the answer to both. She looked into Dina's eyes where she saw only confusion. She didn’t hold it though, she didn’t want to see the love.

"I love you Dina but I am not good for you." 

"Wait-"

"No, Dina. Let me finish." Ellie reached out both hands to grab Dina's shoulders, rooting them to the spot. 

"You didn't deserve the pain and anguish my decisions put you through. I should never have dragged you to Seattle. I should have never left for Santa Barbara. But I did. And that cost you so much of your life, your safety, and your dreams. I am a broken woman who may be beyond fixing but- but you aren't. You deserve someone who will appreciate you, love you, and put you first."

The silence of her declaration was loud and un-ending. Ellie couldn’t look into Dina’s eyes so she looked down at the bracelet; the chain of their love. She vowed to take it off once she returned to the safety of the garage. Ellie then moved Dina to the side and began walking. Stopping only for a second once she was a couple steps away. "I only wish you and Lee the best."

"Ellie no-" Dina sounded even more confused.

"Don't." Ellie jogged off; knowing full well Dina wouldn't follow.

_________________________________

That night was rough for Ellie. She had sat through a rundown of the plan with Maria and she was meeting a patrolman from Butte tomorrow to go over Flag intel. Once Maria left, Ellie laid on her floor in the dark. Too scared to get inside of her bed and have a nightmare. Or was she scared she might dream of Dina? Their early morning cuddles in the farmhouse. Dina’s laughter and JJ squealing in delight.

Ellie had her backpack slung over her shoulder and was almost to the stable. She was carrying the sniper rifle from the hunters in Moose; she considered it a privilege to use it against the Flags.

Ellie glanced over at the daycare, making a mental note to see JJ when she returned. She yearned to make him her main focus instead of Dina. But then she glanced down at her wrist, the hamsa bracelet still tied tightly. She had spent hours the previous night attempting to will herself to remove the bracelet. It never happened.

When she crossed through the stable doors, she saw Maria strapping full saddle bags onto Timber. 

"Maria." She said, coolly.

"Good, you are early. Go grab Blizzard's saddle blanket."

Ellie stepped forward, slipping the sniper rifle into the rifle holster on Timber's saddle before walking to the wall of blankets. She grabbed a fresh one for Blizzard.

"Is the patrolman from Butte coming with me?" Ellie didn't like the prospect of protecting another person she didn't know or trust.

"Yep. She knows the ins and outs of the Flags. Including the Jackson Lake camp they are holed up in." Maria responded, taking the blanket from Ellie.

"She?"

"Yeah, if that's alright with you." Lee said, standing in the stable doorway.

The redhead was holding a crossbow and a dark blue colored backpack. The neck of a soft guitar case peeking up over her right shoulder.

Ellie was speechless.

"Lee knows the Jackson Lake valley better than anyone else. You both will gather as much information as you can about the Flags and then come back here; we will need to make a solid defense plan." Maria was carrying saddle bags for Blizzard now, ignorant to the thick air Ellie and Lee created.

Ellie glared at Lee, hoping it would cause her to back out. But Lee just stepped forward, taking control of the straps from Maria and tying the saddlebags on tight. 

Maria touched Ellie's shoulder. "And please be extra safe this time; Tommy would kill me if anything happened to you."

  
“Right.” Ellie breathed.  _ This is going to suck.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song Credit: "Diggin' Up Bones" by Randy Travis.
> 
> Thank y'all for all the sweet comments and Kudos. These definitely keep me writing so I appreciate the love.


	7. Chapter 7

It was the hottest day of the summer so far and Ellie found herself missing the breeze. The two women had yet to say anything of any substance to each other; both choosing to listen to their horse's hooves instead. Ellie had decided the universe was punishing her and she struggled looking at Lee's back; the guitar case, the red hair, the way she bobbed her head like music was playing.  _ Fucking bullshit _ . Lee pulled on her reins and stopped Blizzard next to a dilapidated sign. 

"Moose." Lee muttered. "We should go that way and follow the road closer to the Tetons."

Ellie questioned, "Wouldn't it be quicker to stay on 191?"

Lee turned Blizzard, a bemused look on the older woman's face. "We will run into Flags on 191; let's cut up by Moose. I know a way for us to get super close to their camp by Jackson Lake."

"Fine." Ellie decided she didn't want to fight; her hand instinctively grabbing Dina's bracelet. Guilt and regret began to build as she clicked for Timber to go towards Moose.

They climbed the hill, Ellie hyper aware of the high spots and the smattering of cabins. She hoped there weren't Flags waiting for them but if there were, she'd enjoy rubbing it in Lee's face later. In a way, Moose looked more gorgeous than it did a few days prior. It was weird, Ellie wasn’t used to thinking about how her surroundings looked. She wondered if she was healing; beginning to see the beauty around her.  _ Why is everything so confusing? _

"Where was the boy shot?"

Ellie pulled her head toward the chapel; Lee followed her eyes and spoke first, "The Chapel of the Transfiguration? Fuckin’ Flags."

_ Lee knows this area well. _ The thought confused and intrigued Ellie so she asked, "How do you know this area so well? Did you grow up around Jackson?"

Lee chuckled. "Oh, now you want to know more about me?"

"No." Ellie sighed. "But I want to know why we aren't going to Moran. I've already scouted Moose, why should I trust you know where you are going?"

"Are you always this stubborn?"

Ellie seethed a bit, "Yes."

"No wonder Dina is in love with you." Lee said with a lazy grin, clicking to Blizzard and trotting up the road, leaving the main stretch of Moose and Ellie behind.

A minute passed before Ellie registered that she needed to follow. Her mind racing just as fast as her heart, everything feeling tumultuous.  _ Why would Lee say that if she- _ Confusion and terror were mixing in her blood and Lee was becoming far more interesting with every passing moment.

By the time Ellie caught up, they were over the hill and back on an overgrown road; headed north. This added great cover but would slow down the horses. Ellie felt herself relax slightly, the fear of an ambush was subsiding. Lee broke the silence with a long, drawn out breath.

"I used to live around Jackson Lake until I was 14, when my mother and sister died. Mom moved us from cabin to cabin; visitor center to visitor center. She never kept us in one place too long because of the Flags’s scouting parties.”

Ellie decided to keep quiet, listening intently to Lee. Lee adjusted herself uncomfortably on the saddle, seemingly picking her words with great care. “My mother would bring my twin sister and I down to Moose. We liked to play inside of the visitor's center. It’s huge glass walls and spacious interior made for great games of hide and seek. And Mom, well, she liked how it rarely had any infected. But for all the rules Mom had to keep us safe-” Lee coughed and gritted her teeth. “She rarely followed them.”

This admission was like a cannonball and it collided with the walls of Ellie's mind. She had sized Lee up to be some kind of other in her mind and not a human being. This revelation tugged at Ellie’s soul. "What happened?"

"My mother was reckless, happy-go-lucky, and- rather flighty." Lee gruffed, keeping her eyes on the road. "She took my sister out to pick berries near Colter Bay. I waited for a whole day and night but they didn't come back. I found them drowned in the shallows of the docks. It wasn’t an accident."

"I'm sorry." Ellie was sincere and Lee hummed in acceptance.

The women kept moving, slowly through the brush. Ellie wondered why Dina never told her about Lee. And even more so, how Dina knew Lee.

________________________________

The sun was sinking low but Ellie was distracted; her mind refusing to focus on the task at hand and instead on why she felt was so selfish. Lee seemed nice, friendly even. Ellie felt Lee’s loss mirrored her own and she knew that was not an easy hand to be dealt. If Lee was going to be in JJ's life, Ellie should at least try to get to know her better.

"Finally, Jenny Lake." Lee's voice brought Ellie back. 

"Jenny Lake?"

"Yeah, it’s the lake before Jackson Lake. We should camp in the visitors center." Lee dismounted Blizzard and began pulling him toward a decent sized building covered by huge, overgrown bushes.

Ellie also dismounted, pulling her pistol out before following Lee toward the structure. Itching to clear the area of threat so she could remove her boots and process.

"You going to shoot me in the back?"

"No." Ellie retorted. "If I wanted you dead I would have killed you already."

"Wow, are we friends now?"

The women walked around the building, finding a parking overhang hidden from the road. They tied up the horses and began un-packing. 

"Well now that we are officially friends," Lee quipped, "What happened to your left hand?"

Ellie shot Lee a warning look.

"Oh-" Lee laughed, "so I tell you something deeply personal but I'm not allowed to ask anything personal?"

"You told me your story of your own admission. And besides, what does it matter?" Ellie replied, annoyed. 

"Well, Dino said you used to play guitar. I don't know if you noticed,” Lee patted the neck of the guitar case slung around her shoulder with pride. “but I love my guitar. If I lost two fingers, I would have figured out a way to continue to play. But she said you stopped and I am curious why?"

Their conversation was entering dangerous territory but Ellie felt drawn to answer. "They were bitten off."

Ellie grabbed her saddlebags and began walking towards the back of the visitor's center.

"Holy hell." Lee sounded concerned and Ellie heard the woman scramble to catch up. “Who bit them off?”

Ellie was unsure how much Dina had told Lee. but what was weird is that she was used to feeling frustrated or angry by questions surrounding Seattle or Santa Barbara. But not this time, this time she felt an urge to share; to get it off of her chest. She stopped by the rear door and dropped her bags. “Her name was Abby.” Ellie felt awkward hearing it out loud. “And it fucking hurt like a bitch.”

Lee looked surprised; almost like she expected Ellie to lie. She pulled her revolver from the small of her back and checked to make sure it was loaded. “I didn’t expect you to tell me that so easily.”

“Well I didn’t expect you to ask.” Ellie checked her own weapon then motioned to the door, silently asking Lee to participate in clearing the center.

“Dino told me you went to Santa Barbara after Abby. But-” Lee stopped as Ellie opened the door and stepped inside slowly. “She said you never told her what happened there.”

Ellie ignored the taller woman and instead began clearing the rear rooms. After 10 minutes, Ellie and Lee made it into the open area of the center, where old world visitor’s mingled and learned about Jenny Lake. The room was empty so Ellie relaxed, taking in the huge hole in the ceiling that let in the light. But she wondered where the debris from a hole that big had gone as the room was pretty clean. Then Ellie saw the fire circle.

“Super glad no one came and fucked this place up; I love camping in here.”

Lee walked by her, depositing her guitar case by the circle and crossing to the front door. Checking to make sure it was locked. Ellie noticed all the front windows were boarded. She smiled, this was a great way to camp unnoticed. “Did you make this?”

“Yeah, I’m constantly moving around based on where the Flags are.” Lee responded as she crossed to the main desk. “Fuck yeah!”

“What?”

“There is still wood here. I haven’t been here in two, maybe three, years.”

“Great.” Ellie turned to go grab the rest of the stuff. 

_________________________________________________

The fire was nice and having the smoke exit through the roof really cut down their camp being seen from the road; a bonus that Ellie had rarely been afforded. Ellie had cooked the two women a tomato and jerky base stew, filled with corn and peas from the Jackson greenhouses. While Ellie stirred, Lee leaned against an old wooden bench, picking random guitar riffs and humming. 

Ellie divided the stew into bowls and Lee suddenly stopped. “Did you do it?”

“Do what?” 

“Kill Abby.” Lee leaned forward, adjusting the guitar on her lap.

Ellie paused.  _ No one has asked me that. _ “I-”

Ellie found herself unable to say it out loud. Lee’s face had changed almost like she was being possessed by something evil. “I wish I could-” Lee suddenly said, her deepened voice sounded familiar to Ellie. Angry, vengeful. “Kill him.”

The women stared at each other. The fire between them suddenly felt like deeper understanding and Ellie wondered how long revenge had consumed Lee. 

“The man who killed your mother and sister?” Ellie asked.

“No.” Lee leaned back, her face seemed to turn back to normal, like the anger inside had suddenly subsided. “I am sorry I interrupted you.”

Ellie stood, a tad confused. She rounded the fire and held out a bowl of food to Lee before sitting down a few feet away. “No.” Ellie whispered. “I let her go.”

Lee looked at Ellie but didn’t say anything, she instead began eating. Ellie wondered why it felt so easy to tell Lee all of this. Maybe because they were far more similar and shared a mutual adoration for Dina.  _ Dina. _

“Can I ask you a question?” Ellie mused.

“As long as it isn’t about him.”

Ellie was intrigued but she nodded. “How do you and Dina know each other? I- She. She never told me about you.”

Lee laughed, “Yeah, she told me that last night.”

Ellie felt lonely hearing that; knowing Lee consoled Dina. Lee sensed the emotion and said, “After my family died I traveled South. I wandered into Jackson where I met an older man, Jim. He was a traveling guitarist and he went between friendly zones, trading his songs and lessons for food and supplies. He taught me music and I fell in love with making people happy; so after he couldn’t travel anymore, I started to. I met Talia and Dina outside of Colorado Springs. They were being attacked by a traveling horde; I was able to get them to the friendly zone.”

“And you brought them to Jackson?’

Lee laughed. “No.”

Ellie sighed, still feeling confused. “How old were you both?”

“I was 16. Dina was 11. Talia was-” Lee trailed off.

“So, did you travel with them?”

“Yeah, you could put it that way.” Lee laughed a sad laugh.

“Put it that way?”

“Well yeah. I kind of followed them around until they let me travel with them. They never stayed in one place too long and I never wanted to be far from her.”

_ Her? _ Ellie was beginning to get frustrated, jealousy and guilt clouded Ellie’s heart. “I’ll be honest, I feel like you are leaving a lot out.”

“What do you mean? Dino and I go way back.” Lee placed her bowl down, grabbing up her guitar instead.

Ellie felt her jealousy turn to anger. “Are you really going to ignore the elephant in the room?”

Lee began picking, confusion in her eyes. “The only elephant in the room is why you left last night and when Dino returned, she was crying.”

“I know Dina is involved with you!” Ellie raised her voice, feeling the emotions of it all come forward. “I am in love with Dina but I don’t deserve her. And I definitely don’t deserve to meddle in her affairs.”

The guitar stopped. Lee began laughing. Not just any old laugh but a full, deep laugh. “Are you serious right now?”

Ellie felt embarrassment creep up her neck, flushing her face red. “Well aren’t you?”

“No!” Lee wheezed.

Ellie was gobsmacked. Her hand immediately grasped her bracelet as emotions of relief and dread surged through her veins. Ellie didn’t know what to say; she felt like a fool. Lee’s laughing began to subside and the older woman placed her guitar down and stood, walking the few steps to be in front of Ellie. “Stand up.”

Ellie stood, unsure of herself and her mind.

Lee grabbed her shoulders and the pulled her into a hug before stepping back and addressing her head on, “I probably shouldn’t say this but god, you are fucking dense. Dina is so in love with you that she thinks she messed up her last chance with you. She’s been avoiding you since you returned because she was unsure if she could trust you and now she thinks that distance caused you to move on. And like damn kid, she never stopped loving you. And she sure as hell isn’t in love with me.”

“But- people said you brought her back to Jackson. And she never told me who you were and she told me everything- and shit, you are living in her house!” Ellie was feeling combative, stupid; she wanted to crawl into a hole.

Lee turned to face the fire. “I did bring her back to Jackson, after Talia was-” 

Ellie felt the air change. 

“Dino is like a sister to me. I knew she would be safe in Jackson.”

“Why didn’t you stay?”

Lee scowled, bringing her hands up into her hair. “I left to kill the men who killed Talia.”

Ellie’s eyes went wide. Dina was just as used to abandonment as she was. Ellie couldn’t believe she had put Dina through such pain. “I left her too. Why did you leave her?”

“Talia and I-” Lee breathed. “were lovers.” Lee picked up her guitar and sat back down, slowly picking out a tune. Ellie didn’t recognize the song but her soul could feel the anguish.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love all your comments and kudos! Thank you for the support!


	8. Chapter 8

That night when Ellie slept, she slept the deepest sleep she has had since Joel died. When she awoke the next morning, it wasn’t because of a nightmare, instead it was due to the sun coming in through the roof, warming her sleeping bag. Ellie pushed herself to a sitting position, rubbing her eyes and looking around. Lee was re-stringing her guitar on a bench, lightly humming an oddly familiar tune.  _ Girls just wanna have fun. _

“I didn’t take you for a Cyndi Lauper fan.” Ellie yawned.

Lee laughed. “Well I thought you were a stick in the mud. I’m glad we are growing as people.”

Ellie scoffed, climbing out of her sleeping bag and looking up. It looked like it was already mid to late morning. Ellie cursed herself; they had a mission to complete and she had slept in. “Fuck, it looks like its already mid morning. Why didn’t you wake me up?”

Lee finished up the last string, strumming it to tune it to the correct key. “We aren’t in a hurry. And you needed the sleep.”

Ellie groaned, turning to roll up her bag. She did need sleep. And after their conversation last night, Ellie had a lot of other things that she needed. She was even tempted to just turn back to Jackson, find Dina, and grovel.  _ What a fucking mess. _ She grabbed her thigh holster, strapping it quickly, grumbling unintelligible words to herself. 

“Relax.” Lee said. “We didn’t need to rush today anyway. The road will lead us up through the Teton National Park and then we will take a back road to my Mom’s cabin on Spalding Bay. I’ll need most of the evening to get the boat together.”

“The boat?”

“Yeah, we will leave early tomorrow morning for Donoho Point.” Lee was packing her guitar into its case, like Ellie knew this plan the entire time.

“But isn’t the camp at Signal Mountain Lodge? Maria said the map marked it as base camp.” Ellie was tired of being left out of the loop. “We were going to observe from the Signal Trail. Maria was very clear.”

“Yeah, Donoho Point is an island that overlooks Signal Mountain Lodge. And anyway, Maria doesn’t need to know.”

“Really?” Ellie huffed, pulling a piece of bread out of her pack and stuffing part of it in her mouth. “I feel like you are keeping the true plan from me.”

“I mean yeah.” Lee stood, throwing the guitar case over her shoulder and grinning. “You wouldn’t have agreed if I told you.”

“What wouldn’t I agree to?” Ellie queried.

“You’ll find out tomorrow morning. Let’s get moving.”

_______________________________________________________

Ellie and Lee had been on the Spalding Bay back road for about 15 minutes when the thick trees parted and Ellie caught sight of the water. It was gorgeous; the mix of water with the trees lining the shore. The glint of the high sun across the surface, making the water look an eerie blue. Ellie wished Dina was here to see it.  _ She would love this _ . “I wish Dina was here.”

Lee snorted.

“What?” Ellie felt embarrassed now. “Fuck you.”

“You have a mighty large chip on your shoulder.” Lee laughed and then sighed before looking over at Ellie. “Can I be honest with you?”

Ellie didn’t know how to answer that. The past week had been weird; she was unsure why her emotions and insecurities were etched into every aspect. Her world had been bleak and traumatic for years and suddenly she was feeling things fall into place; like she was more sure of her path. “I guess.”

“You are holding yourself back.” Lee said with sincerity. “Why do you only show your real self randomly and then get all-” Lee flipped her hand back and forth. “pissy when someone tries to get to know you?”

Ellie hadn’t thought about it that way. “I don’t know. People, just, piss me off.”

Lee laughed. The two both slowed their horses' pace, and Lee turned her head to take in the sight of the water. “Who was the first person to die?”

Ellie froze, her mind immediately flipping to a fuzzy image of her mother but that faded slowly to an image of Riley, the older girl standing in the mall holding her water gun; determination painted across her features. The memory made her chest hurt and she adjusted herself on the saddle. “My mother. But I don’t remember her- at least, not like you remember yours.”

“Hmm.” Lee hummed in response.

“Then it was Riley. My best friend; we met in military school when I was a teenager. She and I-” Ellie caught herself, the issue of her immunity did not need to be shared. “She was bitten when we snuck out. I watched her- turn.”

The two rode in silence for a few minutes while Ellie tried to compose herself. Ellie felt like she was at the cusp of a new friendship. This feeling urged her to share more.

“I think you know who I lost next.” Ellie thought about Joel, the memory felt light and sweet. Maybe her anger was subsiding. 

“You’ve had a rough go of it.” Lee responded.

“Everyone has had a rough go of it.”

“You’re right.”

“Why do you call Dina, Dino?” Ellie asked as they rounded the next bend, the road obviously leading straight to the small bay.

Lee laughed a full laugh before suddenly singing with loud gusto, her arms flailing wildly,

**“When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie**

**That's amore**

**When the world seems to shine like you've had too much wine**

**That's amore”**

“Excuse Me?” Ellie could barely contain her laughter. 

“That’s why she is called Dino.” Lee smirked.

“That makes no sense.”

“Alright.” Lee mused. “We were outside of Pueblo, Colorado somewhere; I had only been with them for maybe six months at that point. We had been traveling around the upper part of the state before making our way back towards New Mexico. Dina was determined to get something from Albuquerque-” Lee sounded sad all of a sudden. 

“Well, we had been camping around Pueblo awhile as Talia didn’t want to go back. The Ravens scared her. Talia and Dina had fought about it the entire day before Talia had decided to go to a trading post near the town to try and get us a better variety of food. Before she left, she prayed over Dina and the two hugged. I was confused and I asked Dina about it.”

The two were coming to the end of the road, a small shack sat off in a clearing in the woods and a small powerboat was tied off at the dock. Lee stopped Blizzard and turned to Ellie.

“Dina explained it was just Talia being Talia.” Lee smiled. “I am sure you know, Talia was deeply religious. She even had me participate in Jewish holidays and small prayer sessions. I love that about Talia, she was so driven and humble.”

“Dina has told me a few stories; I wish I could have met her.”

“Yeah, me too. Talia was protective, strong, quick-witted, and her presence always brought those around her a great inner peace. She would always tousle my hair and say,  _ Sing me a song, Red _ . And when I would ask her which one, She would click her tongue and say,  _ you know what I like _ .” Lee said with an air of longing.

“Wow.” Ellie said.

“Yeah. Well, I teased Dina because Talia was always so protective of her. Dina got all teenager-y about it so I sang that Dean Martin song to make her laugh. It became a thing I did anytime she was stressed out or upset. And if you didn’t know, Dean Martin’s nickname was Dino. And well Dina, Dino… It stuck.” Lee finished, dismounting Blizzard with a thud.

**“When the stars make you drool just like a pasta e fasul**

**That's amore”**

Before Lee could continue, a loud infected screech came from behind the shack and Ellie’s eyes shot up. Four runners came bolting out, followed by a clicker and it scared Timber, causing Ellie to be thrown off. The force of the fall knocked the wind out of her. Ellie coughed harshly, her lungs trying to bring air back in too quickly. Lee slapped Blizzard on the rear, causing him to run before she reached out a hand to Ellie. “We gotta go!”

Ellie felt herself being ripped up to her feet and she followed Lee towards the woods, struggling to regain her breath. They ran as fast as they could, avoiding branches and overgrowth. Ellie tumbled forward onto the ground before lifting herself back up, moving forward. Before she could gain back her senses, she heard footsteps close on her heels and felt herself being tugged backwards, a runner toppling onto her. Ellie punched the runner in the gut before reaching her left hand to her pocket, pulling out her switchblade as she punched again. The runner flipped itself on top of Ellie, trying its best to get at her neck. She stabbed the runner through the temple and its body fell onto her as she heard revolver shots.

Another thud; Ellie leaned her head back to see two runners fall. The younger woman pulled her legs underneath the runner, kicking its body off of herself before scrambling to stand up. The final runner swung wildly at Ellie, she stepped to the left in a dodge before Lee stepped forward to slam the butt of her revolver down on its head. Ellie grabbed the runner, pushing it to the ground before pulling her pistol and shooting it in the head.

“Fuckin’ hell.” Lee was breathing heavily.

That’s when the two women heard a rifle shot; it was coming from the direction of the shack and the road. Their eyes met before Ellie spoke, “That’s not good.” The women cautiously made their way back toward the road. The woods were not thick enough to block their view and Ellie adjusted her grip on the gun, hoping there wouldn’t be an ambush waiting for them.

“I see Blizzard and Timber.” Lee whispered, pointing to the bend of the road. The horses were standing still, eating grass, their stop and stay training coming into use. 

Ellie walked a bit closer, standing to get a better view. “No way.” Ellie saw a third horse; it’s pale complexion familiar.  _ Japan. _

“What?” 

Ellie began power-walking out of the woods, causing Lee to partially yell, “Where are you going?”

“Dina!?” Ellie called as she exited the wood into the clearing.

“Over here!” Dina called back, her voice coming from closer to the shack.

Lee came bounding out of the woods, her face full of confusion. Ellie nodded toward the shack, Dina’s outline clear as day. As Ellie hurried over she noticed Dina had her hair tied up in her usual ponytail, her brown boots, tight jeans, navy blue button up, and maroon backpack. Dina’s hunting rifle was on the ground and she was leaning over a dead clicker. Dina stood and turned as Ellie came closer.

Lee knocked Ellie out of the way theatrically to hug Dina, “Dino!”

Ellie felt uncomfortable, her foolishness coming forward in her mind. But the thoughts were side-lined temporarily as she asked, “Dina, what are you doing here?”

Dina ignored Ellie, instead deepening the hug with Lee. “Are you both ok?” Dina asked, still avoiding Ellie’s eyes and her question.

“Yeah, Dino, just some runners. Nothing special.” Lee responded, punching Dina in the arm lightly before backing away. “What are you doing here?”

“Jackson was attacked. No casualties and we were able to secure the walls but there are definitely more Flags than I’ve seen anywhere near Jackson.” Dina said seriously, “Maria is pissed at you, Lee.”

Lee chucked before bringing her hand up into her hair. “Is she now?”

“Yeah.” Dina scolded. “She is.”

Dina looked toward the shack before turning back, “I knew you’d both be here.”

“How did you know?”

“I know you a lot better than you think. And Maria knows you are the one who torched Butte; do you want to explain to me why you did that.” Dina was pissed.

Lee scoffed and began walking toward the dock. Ellie was utterly confused.

Dina called after her, “It won’t bring her back!”

Lee stopped for a second before continuing on. Dina began rubbing her face, a stressed out sign escaping her lips. “You are fucking stupid Lee.”

Ellie looked back at the dock; wondering what Lee had turned this scouting mission into. The redhead pulled the guitar from her back and unzipped the case, removing the instrument and sitting down on the dock. An unfamiliar tune began wafting in the wind.

“Dina?” Ellie asked, moving closer to her.

Dina turned, finally meeting Ellie’s eyes. They held their gaze and Ellie could see pain in Dina’s browns- the questions and accusations from the other night swirling the air. Ellie wanted to reach forward and grasp Dina’s cheeks with her hands. She wanted to pull the woman into a warm embrace; to lean her forehead to her’s, lightly kissing her lips. Ellie had never felt so inwardly confident but been so outwardly insecure. Her hands came together and she touched where her fingers were missing before allowing herself to caress the bracelet. Dina broke the gaze to look down and see Ellie’s hands on the bracelet, her mouth falling open slightly. Ellie felt her breath catch.

But the two stood in silence. Dina shifted her weight from one leg to the other, the awkwardness permeating the space. Lee’s strumming and singing reaching their ears. All Ellie could make out was a random “Ho” then “Hey” with some folksy sounding words following. When Ellie turned to look at the dock, Dina walked toward the horses.

“I’ll grab the horses.” Dina said softly. “Go ask Lee to get the boat ready.”

Ellie nodded but she couldn’t move from her spot. She couldn’t stop herself from watching Dina walk away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "That's Amore" by Dean Martin
> 
> And a fun little mention of "Ho, Hey" by The Lumineers.
> 
> I earnestly hope you are all enjoying this fanfiction as much I am enjoying writing it. Please continue to leave kudos and comments; I honestly feel they propel me forward in all the best ways.


	9. Chapter 9

Ellie was not used to this. In her twenty-two years, she had never been the one who was not brooding or angry. But here she was, crouched by the fire, boiling pasta and feeling the overwhelming animosity between Lee and Dina. She cautiously looked over at Dina; the woman was leaned up against the front porch reading " _ What to Expect: The Toddler Years _ ." But the brunette had not turned a page in at least ten minutes, instead she was clenching and un-clenching her jaw. Ellie had seen this before, but only when she was dating Cat or had stayed away from the farmhouse too long. Ellie turned to look at Lee, who was restringing her guitar again.  _ How do I fix this? _

"Lee, what are you doing?" Ellie asked, stirring the pasta sauce. 

"Did you even play guitar?" Lee sounded nasty; her mood had definitely not changed.

"Fucking lay off, Lee." Dina slammed her book closed. 

Ellie felt a tinge of comfort. "I was just asking because you are stringing it backwards."

Lee was picking the D string, tuning it, her face scrunched up in annoyance. "I know that."

Ellie looked at Dina, who actually met her gaze. Ellie mouthed 'thank you' and was met with Dina's facial expression becoming light, slack. 

"Come over here, Ellie." Lee demanded.

"The pasta is almost-"

"Dina, do you think you can take care of that?" Lee looked in the brunette's direction.

Ellie stood at the same time as Dina. Dina took the few steps toward her so Ellie turned the spoon handle towards her. Dina grabbed it, touching Ellie's hand in the process. The touch sent a jolt of electricity through Ellie's body. Ellie pulled away and walked over to the log Lee was sitting on, sitting down a foot away. Ellie was unsure what was going on.

"Here." Lee passed the instrument to Ellie.

"I'm not fucking-" Ellie began.

"Lee. This isn't a good idea." Dina interjected, her eyes looking cautiously from Ellie to Lee.

"It's a great idea." Lee still sounded aggravated. "I've strung the guitar so you can play left handed. You really only need two fingers to pick and your thumb to strum."

"I know how to fucking play." Ellie shot back, feeling ashamed.

"Alright then." Lee responded handing Ellie a guitar pick. "Play me something then."

Ellie gripped the neck, releasing a frustrated grunt before she began cycling through chord positions with her right hand. It felt awkward not using her left hand but her muscle memory was strong and she clamped down A minor. It sounded wonky so she clamped down harder, feeling her un-calloused fingertips scream. A memory of Joel rushing forward, his words filling her mind:  _ "The chords for this song are A minor, D minor, E, then A minor. Easy chord progression. Let me show you how it goes then you can try it, kiddo." _

Ellie began picking out the intro, A minor, D minor, E. She messed up the picking on the final A minor so she started from the beginning, strumming out the tune instead. She went through the intro a few times, gaining confidence with every cycle. Suddenly she began singing, unable to stop herself.

**"I'm just a poor wayfaring stranger-**

**Traveling through this world below"**

Ellie stopped, grabbing onto the body of the guitar for support. Instead of sadness or guilt, she felt elation.  _ I can still play.  _ She thought it would be too hard, too painful. But instead she wanted to continue to play until her fingers bled; but now was not the time.

"Good choice." Lee murmured, the energy had changed.

Ellie looked up at Dina, who was looking at her with loving concern. "Guess I can still do it." Ellie said sheepishly.

"You can do anything." Dina responded. "And dinner is ready."

Ellie handed the guitar back to Lee, standing up to help Dina.

_____________________________

The three women ate in silence. Ellie was feeling oddly happy and content in the silence until she remembered the mission at hand; and whatever Lee had hijacked this mission to be.

"Alright you two, it's time to fess up." Ellie began, placing her bowl on a nearby rock. “What are we really doing out here. Lee?”

"I like to steal knives and forks from Seth." Lee deadpanned, sidestepping the question. "Then after he would yell about it for a while, I'd put them back. He wouldn’t stop talking about the ‘flatware conspiracy.’ Old fogey."

Dina shot Lee a seething look, knowing full well what Ellie was asking about. Lee’s continual dodging of questions was putting a strain on Dina.

"Lee. What the fuck are we doing out here?" Ellie wasn’t going to play along this time.

"Oh come on, I thought you hated Seth."

"This is not a joke." Dina sounded almost hateful.

"Talia would have thought it was funny." Lee grumbled.

"Talia would have screamed at you in Yiddish and made you sleep outside." Dina screamed before sighing, hurt by how flippant Lee was acting.

Lee picked up on the hurt and pulled herself up to a full sitting position. "Fine. We are going to Donoho Point."

"And?" Ellie pushed.

"I have a camp there. Weapons, ammo, explosives. I want the two of you to help me scout the lodge. If their leader, Peter, is there then I will take the extra row boat over and you two can go back to Jackson with Maria's precious information."

"How do you know about Peter?" Ellie questioned. “Obviously Maria didn’t tell you about him and I only have heard of him in passing. You need to tell us everything.”

Lee leaned forward, un-answering.

"Lee." Dina's voice was shaky. "Who is Peter?"

Ellie saw Dina stand slowly, she was trembling. Ellie couldn't take the sight of the woman upset, she stood and walked to Dina, placing her left hand on Dina's shoulder for comfort. Though Ellie had no idea who was being comforted more. 

"Lee. Tell me." Dina's voice was almost a whisper. 

"I killed them all. Anyone who touched her, talked to her, thought about her. I have tracked them up and down the Rockies for years. I knew they were thinking of taking Butte, so I stayed there. Waiting, hoping. And when they finally attacked Butte, I intentionally got caught so I could burn that motherfucker with the town they destroyed. But they fucking got him back to the stupid lodge.” Lee was exploding with anger.

“Lee what did he do?” Dina asked. 

Peter is-" Lee looked at the fire. "His men are the ones that kidnapped us. And when we escaped without her, he kept her to himself. When we escaped, I thought she was dead, Dina. The guys I thought murdered her told me that Peter kept her in Signal Lodge for years; that he killed her when she tried to escape."

Ellie felt her heart drop into her stomach and panic splashed up as she heard Dina scream in agony. The scream caused a flashback of Abby raising the golf club into the air, her own voice screaming " _ No! _ " She shut her eyes, grimacing.

Dina's hands suddenly grabbed at her shoulders, this caused Ellie's eyes to open. She saw the pain on Dina's face and Ellie knew she had to pull herself together for Dina. Ellie breathed in deeply, dragging Dina into a hug. Dina resisted at first before relaxing and wrapping her arms around Ellie. Ellie pulled their bodies closer, trying to hold Dina tighter, leaning her head close to Dina's ear "I got you."

Dina began sobbing, her tears wetting Ellie's t-shirt. Ellie kept focus on Dina, allowing the woman to keep her in this moment. Comforting Dina became her sole purpose.

Lee, however, continued to look at the fire; her eyes steely and focused.

  
  


_________________________________

  
  


Ellie smelled the early morning lake air through the broken windows of the cabin, it's wet freshness filling her lungs. She opened her eyes, noticing the pre-dawn light filtering in through the trees. There was a weight on her left shoulder and hip, pinning her to the floor of the cabin.  _ Dina _ . 

The previous night, Lee had dragged her sleeping bag to the dock. Dina had gone into the cabin, slamming the door hard behind her. Ellie made sure the fire was put out properly and cleaned up the food and mess in the silence of the night. When she finally entered the cabin, she noticed Dina had her small camping lamp on. The brunette was zipping her sleeping bag up with Ellie's, creating a large quilt. Ellie's breath hitched.

The two women's eyes met and held for a long moment. Dina flipped back a corner of the now large sleeping bag cover and patted the ground next to her. Ellie climbed in without speaking, scared of ruining the unspoken thing they currently had going. Ellie pulled her pillow underneath her head and the sleeping bag up around her shoulders. Dina was on her side, facing away from Ellie. After a couple minutes passed, Dina reached behind her and grabbed Ellie, pulling on her, silently asking her for more. So Ellie rolled over and snaked an arm around Dina's waist, pulling the woman in, spooning her lightly. Dina had hummed in appreciation; pulling in a sniffle and letting out a sign. Ellie fell asleep not long after, the scent of Dina’s hair filling her senses.

Now, Ellie was laying underneath the soft woman, her t-shirt riding up and the sleeping bag only covering her legs. Dina's hand possessively grasping the collar of Ellie's t-shirt. She hadn't felt so needed, so useful in a long time. Ellie wanted to treasure this moment. Dina began to stir, causing Ellie's elation to dissipate. She knew full well things would be different once Dina was awake. "Ellie?"

Ellie turned her head down to meet Dina's upward facing eyes.  _ God she is so beautiful.  _ Dina's hand let go of Ellie's shirt, crossing lightly between her breasts, and landing flat on her bare stomach. Ellie felt a familiar warmth flow between her legs as tingles rose up her back, climbing gracefully across her neck. "Hey."

Dina smiled. "Hey."

They held their eyes for a long moment before Dina pushed herself up and away, Ellie instantly missing her touch. "We need to go check on Lee."

"Right." Ellie pulled herself up onto her side, pulling down her t-shirt and kicking off the sleeping bag. "Are we going to do this?"

Dina turned her head quickly towards Ellie, confusion and apprehension etched across her smooth features.

"The mission." Ellie corrected, knowing how Dina interpreted her words. "We could always knock Lee over her head with her guitar and drag her back to Jackson."

Dina's face sunk in disappointment before she spoke, "We should at least go to Donohoe. We can gather the intel and then convince her to come back with us."

"So, you don't want to go after Peter?" Ellie asked.

"Did it help you, going after Abby?" Dina countered, not missing a beat.

"Yes." Ellie exhaled. "But I didn't kill Abby. I let her go."

Dina stood, her face expressionless, and began un-zipping the sleeping bags in earnest. She tossed Ellie hers before beginning to stuff her own into her rucksack. "You gonna say something?" Ellie asked, feeling the material of the bag twist in her hands.

"Good." Dina returned, looking into her eyes. 

The door to the cabin swung open, Lee stepped inside with Ellie's new sniper rifle. "What ammo does this bad boy take?"

Dina grabbed her pillow and quickly turned, leaving the cabin before Ellie could answer.

Ellie sighed. "7.62."

"Dope." Lee responded. "I have a ton of it."

Ellie grabbed her own things and began shuffling to the door. 

"Did I interrupt something?" Lee questioned.

"No." Ellie pushed her way out.

______________________________

  
  


The women left the horse's lightly tied on long leads near the cabin; they would stick around but still be able to break the knot and run if they needed to. The motor on the tiny boat was loud but at least it ran. Only because Lee had spent most of the prior afternoon nursing it back to life. Well, once Dina fixed the control board. Dina sat at the bow with her hunting rifle across her lap, her hair flapping about in the wind. The bay was beautiful but Ellie was purely focused on Dina's back, trying to figure out how to fix things.

Lee leaned forward and yelled in her ear, "Did you apologize?"

Ellie shot the redhead a look, "Are you going to apologize?"

Lee laughed. Ellie didn't know how the woman separated herself. Lee normally seemed jovial, carefree. But when the subject of Peter came up the previous night, Ellie could only see pure vengeance. The emotion she was so very familiar with; the emotion that was driving everyone apart. 

"There is Donoho point!" Lee yelled. "I need to cross around the back, so that they don't spot us."

Lee drove the boat around to the left, following the shore of the island. Ellie pulled out her binoculars and looked in the direction of the island. It looked uninhabited, just shoreline and thick trees. Ellie craned to get a look at the Flag camp before it went out of sight. She saw a lodge seated near the water, with a decent dock and boats. No people in sight. As far as Ellie could tell, the island was far enough from the Signal Lodge to not be seen well by the naked eye, but with scoped assistance, a shot could probably be made.

After ten minutes, Lee rounded the far side of the island and cut the motor to a slow hum, bringing the boat closer to shore. Dina put her rifle down and grabbed the rope then stood. She was wearing cut off jeans shorts and she had removed her shoes and socks. Ellie watched her intently as Dina checked to see how shallow the water was. Once Lee cut the motor, she jumped out and began pulling the vessel to the shore. One huge tug and the bow ground against the sand as it met the shore. 

"You've gotten a ton better at that." Lee mused. 

"Well, some of us do grow up." Dina replied coolly. 

Lee just nodded. The air was thick again.

"We gotta walk from here. The cabin is around that bend, about three quarters of a mile." Lee propped up the motor then climbed past Ellie. "Ellie, could you help me get the boat further up? We need to tie it off."

"Sure."

Dina grabbed her bag and gun before walking down the shore. Ellie pulled her own bag out but kept watching Dina. Once the brunette was out of earshot, Lee grabbed Ellie's arm. "You have to help me kill him. I can't let go until he's gone."

Ellie grimaced. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I took a nice break yesterday, thank you!
> 
> "Wayfaring Stranger" is an old folk song but I took the styles of Johnny Cash's version.
> 
> Would love to hear your theories and thoughts! Thanks so much for the support.


	10. Chapter 10

The women found the camp easily. Lee had lead them to a cleared out spot set back in the trees. There they found a dark colored canopy with roll up sides. If someone was just looking around the island, it could have been easily missed. Lee trotted up to it and rolled up the front, revealing an impressive array of weapons, ammo, and explosives. 

"Ta-da!" Lee flung her arms out. 

Dina walked in before Ellie, walking over to a box filled with ammo and reaching her hands in, almost like she was distracting herself. Ellie was trying her best to read the woman, to figure out where Dina stood on this plan.

"So, are you guys in?" Lee asked.

Ellie looked at the ground, it was no longer her place to be championing death wishes. But she wanted to know if Lee was actually prepared. "Do you know what Peter looks like?"

Lee turned to look at Ellie before crossing to an empty table with a filing cabinet underneath. She motioned at Ellie and Dina to come over as she pulled a file folder out of the cabinet. Lee opened it and splayed pictures and notes across the table. She shuffled through the pile until she found a particular picture and hand-written note. She held the picture towards Dina.

"I traveled to the motherfucker's town after I picked up his right hand man from a Flag camp outside of Missoula." Lee said. "His man directed me to his pre-outbreak home that he shared with his wife and three kids. That's where I grabbed this picture. The note is from Peter to his camp outside of Butte, directing them to hold position and that he would travel out there from Signal Lodge. This lodge is definitely his home base."

"What makes you so sure he isn't outside of Jackson right now?" Dina asked, pulling the picture from Lee's hands to look at it.

Dina studied the picture, it looked like she was burning holes through the print before passing it to Ellie. Ellie looked at it; it was a family photo. Her eyes were drawn to three smiling children, all with long blonde hair. Peter's wife was also blonde, curvy, and wore a confident smile. Finally Ellie's eyes landed on Peter. He seemed to be large, probably over six feet. His shoulders were wide, a chest like a tree trunk, facial expression stoic, and was bald with a long, full deep brown beard.  _ He looks like a leader of a biker gang from one of Joel's old movies. _ Sadness suddenly hit Ellie. This man most likely took Talia's life; held her for years doing God knows what to her. She needed to see how Dina was doing with all this but she knew it would be difficult; she still hadn't repaired the trauma she had inflicted on Dina.

"Because. He is just pestering Jackson. Hoping I will appear in one of the defense parties." Lee sounded confident.

"I don't recognize him." Dina said suddenly, pulling a chair from a corner and dusting off the seat before sitting down.

Lee placed both hands on the table, glaring at Dina. "That doesn't mean he didn't do it."

"You told me she was carried off by two men and you heard them-." Dina sounded flat, pained. "That they told you they murdered her."

"Because that's what happened! I was being tortured. Physically by Flags and mentally by her screams. Once those scumbags told me she was dead, I became focused on you. I got you out of there. I-" 

"Maybe you shouldn't have." Dina said quietly. 

Ellie began to go to Dina but was pushed out of the way by Lee. Lee stooped in front of Dina, placing a hand on Dina's cheek and looking her in the eyes.

"I loved her, Dina. And she loved you more than anything in this world. I wouldn't have forgiven myself if I had let you die there." Lee breathed. "And if I quit now, I will never forgive myself for leaving Talia behind."

Ellie watched the two women hug, unsure of what was to come. 

_______________________________

Ellie was prone on a rock on the beach, using her sniper rifle scope to scout the shoreline. It was late afternoon and the sun was setting behind Ellie. It was the best time to scout as she was not worried about glare on her scope giving away her position.

She moved herself slightly, following the dock that was closest to the Signal Lodge. There were only two boats and one guard, a skinny looking man who was seated on the dock edge. The man yawned frequently and kept his eyes on the water.  _ People must rarely attack the Lodge. _ Ellie pulled up, noticing a large canopy by the entrance to the lodge. A few picnic tables with about six men, all eating and talking. Nearby there was a small camp of tents; no more than twelve and it looked like it had open space for more tents. Ellie considered this a viable target as most of the men probably went to Jackson. The lodge itself was hard to see into and Ellie rarely saw anyone come or go through the double doors. Peter probably kept it for himself and Ellie wondered what or who was inside there with him.

After almost an hour, Ellie switched to sitting against the rock, using her binoculars to keep an eye on the men by the lodge. She assumed there were guards posted on the road side as the dock side guard was already relieved by a man who rotated from the front. Probably a two hour rotation. If she was being honest with herself, they could decimate this camp easily. But that isn't what Maria would want as she knew the woman cared more about defense than offense. 

And then there is the issue of Peter. If this had happened three years prior, Ellie would have already grabbed the rowboat and would be hiding near the lodge, waiting for the dark of night. But instead, she found herself thinking about the first night Dina and Ellie stayed out at the farmhouse. The first night they talked about Abby. How Ellie beat herself up for allowing Abby to get the upper hand and the loss of Jesse. Dina had told her the story of losing Talia; of wanting to find her killers and torture them for hours and hours. But every time she thought about that, she told Ellie that she heard Talia's voice in her mind, " _ This world will never be fair, Dina. But we come from a long line of survivors. And we only have survived because we move on." _

Ellie thought about those words.  _ We move on. _

"Ellie?"

Dina was suddenly sitting beside her. Ellie looked over at the woman, she had been crying. "Are you ok?" Ellie asked.

"Yeah."

"What do you need?" Ellie asked as she reached out to touch Dina's arm.

"A bong hit would be kind of nice right now." Dina quipped, smiling lightly.

Ellie laughed. "Not sure getting high is going to help us out of this mess this time."

"Alright. Then I want to hug JJ."

"Mmm." Ellie hummed. "I really miss the little spud."

"And he misses you." Dina said quietly. A few moments pass before she adds, "We both miss you."

Dina's hand then covered Ellie's as the brunette looked out over the water. "What did you figure out."

"Can't be more than twenty-five. There are a lot of missing tents and only about 4 people who seem to be patrolling as guards. And they are not very good at it. Only a select few people go into or come out of the Lodge. It looks like Peter keeps it all to himself." Ellie pulled her binoculars back up, scanning the area. 

"There were probably fifty to sixty Flags that Wendy and Kyle found camping on the outskirts of Jackson. I think Tommy is right, this is their last hurrah." Dina said.

"Maria would love this information; we could pretty much pick off the Flags around Jackson without worry of lots of reinforcements. Doubtful he could take the settlement, even if he wanted to. And if Maria wanted to be bold, it would be easy to send a group of ten to twenty people and wipe this camp right off the map." Ellie responded as she pulled the scope towards movement from the road. A beat up truck was pulling up. "A truck just pulled up."

"Interesting." Dina responded, laying her hand onto Ellie's thigh. Ellie blinked rapidly but kept her focus on the truck. A tall man exited the driver's seat and walked to the lodge, entering the double doors.

"A tall guy just went in." Ellie informed.

"Why did you think Lee and I were together?" Dina asked, she was using her serious tone.

"Honestly?" Ellie responded, unable to put down the binoculars and look at Dina. "I don't know. I was so focused on winning you back that I allowed myself to spiral at the slightest notion you had moved on."

"Well, it has definitely gone to Lee's head." Dina replied, ignoring the meat of the answer.

Ellie didn't respond, she instead saw movement on an upper lodge floor. A door opened to one of the balconies and the tall man stepped out. His body language was of someone who was arguing; furious. Then she saw him step out; large and still sporting the long, full beard.  _ Peter. _

"What do you see?" Dina had noticed the change.

"It's Peter." Ellie replied, lowering the binoculars to look over at Dina. "He is definitely there. Arguing with the guy who just drove up."

Dina put out a hand, her face unreadable for Ellie. Ellie placed the binoculars into her hand and pointed to which balcony she should be looking at. Dina gasped. 

"So Lee was right. He's here."

"What's our plan?" Ellie asked.

Dina didn't respond for a long while, still looking at the Lodge. "Let's keep it to ourselves and go back to Jackson. We shouldn't be doing this."

"Ok." Ellie responds. "How are we going to convince Lee?"

Dina lowered the binoculars before looking over at Ellie. "I'm sorry I have avoided you since you got back."

Ellie's breath hitched. "What?"

"I was trying to punish you for leaving JJ; for leaving me. So when you ran away the other night, I figured out that I was being selfish." Dina's voice sounded so sincere, it was causing butterflies in Ellie's gut.

"No, Dina. You have nothing to apologize for. I am the one that left. You were just trying to protect yourself."

"I-" Dina stood up, and looked down at Ellie. "I don't know how to restart this. But I want you to know that I've never stopped loving you."

Ellie stood too but she didn't know what to say. The sound of sand grinding made both women look back. Lee was dragging a row boat toward the water. 

"Lee!" Dina turned to jog over. "Where the hell are you going?"

"The plan." Lee said as she got the boat close to the water. "You both can't stop me."

"Alright, then let us help you then." Dina replied. "Ellie, can you help Lee grab the rest of her supplies. I'll get the boat in the water."

"You sure, Dino?" Lee asked.

"No." Dina responded. "Ellie?"

"Sure." Ellie responded as she looked at Lee. Lee gestured for Ellie to follow her back up into the woods.

Once they were in the trees, Lee stopped. "If I don't make it back, you have to figure yourself out and make it up to Dina. She deserves someone who is sure of their love."

"I know."

Lee grabbed her bag and a box of ammo while Ellie grabbed a rifle and a silenced smg. The two nodded at each other before walking back down to the beach. Ellie stared at her feet while she walked, thinking about Dina and why it was so difficult to make things right with her.

"Fuck me." 

Lee's words brought Ellie's eyes up. The rowboat and Dina were gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end is nigh. 
> 
> Thanks for reading and commenting! All kudos and comments are appreciated.


	11. Chapter 11

Ellie felt panic wash over her. She immediately dropped the guns she was carrying and ran to the rock that she was just sitting with Dina at. Ellie's backpack with her hunting rifle, shot-gun, supplies, and binoculars was gone. All that was left was the sniper rifle and a note, folded and placed on the sniper stock. Ellie grabbed the note and unfolded it, her hands shaking.

" _ Ellie, _

_ If you are reading this, I somehow figured out how to get to Signal Lodge without you both. _

_ I know better. I should be with JJ right now in Jackson. I should have gone along with you in taking Lee back and forgetting all of this. But I can't. I am a hypocrite. And I hope you can find it in yourself to forgive me for treating you with such a double standard. I never meant to make you feel like your struggle was less important. I always admired your drive and your determination. I hope you know how much I love you. But I loved her too. And now I understand why you left. _

_ Lee loves my sister with every ounce of her being. But I forgot about Talia; I never tried to figure out what happened to her. I want to make it right.  _

_ Dina _

__

Ellie felt tears well up in her eyes before they silently began streaming down her face. The pain in her forehead grew as she folded the note back up and placed it in her chest pocket. She then picked up her rifle and pointed it at the lake, hoping to catch sight of where Dina went.

She scanned for a bit, trying her best to keep her tears away and her eyes focused. 

"What the fuck is Dina thinking?" Lee said exasperatedly.

"Don't act like you don't know."

"Fuck." Lee replied, slumping down against the rock. "I should have just taken care of this by myself."

Ellie couldn't see Dina since it almost was fully dark and the brunette must have rowed to the closer outcropping off to the left of the lodge. 

Ellie's anger built before spilling out. "What you should have done was tell Dina the truth back in Jackson. She may have been able to cope there, but she is vulnerable out here! So stop acting like you don't know why she took the fucking boat!"

Lee looked up at Ellie, Dina's departure obviously affecting her. "I always thought she was the strong one."

"Me too." Ellie breathed. "Now grab your shit and let's get to the motor boat. We can't let her go through with this. She doesn't want to; she just thinks she has to."

_______________________________

Ellie jumped from the bow of the motor boat onto the shoreline, they were draped in total darkness. Lee and Ellie had to take the 15 minute walk around the island to the other boat. Once they pushed off, they had to run the motor in the lowest setting, hoping they wouldn't alert any Flags as they made their way to the outcropping. So much time was lost but Ellie knew they couldn’t be too far behind Dina. Dina was careful, she wouldn’t run into the Flag camp guns blazing. Now that Ellie looked around, she saw the rowboat pulled into a little cove and her heart sank a bit.  _ Dina. _

Ellie pulled the silenced smg out of the boat and handed it to Lee before grabbing the sniper rifle and slinging it over her shoulder. Ellie knew the women needed to find a high place to look over the camp; Ellie could easily spot Dina from up high. She walked to the edge of the trees before seeing a small two story cabin set off to the side of the lodge. The cabin was just far enough away to not be an active part of the flag operation. She snapped her fingers at Lee and then pointed. Lee looked at the cabin before smiling then nodding in agreement. 

Ellie made her way to the cabin, hearing distant Flags talking by their tents. As the women got close to the building's door, Ellie saw a shape on the ground and she looked at Lee. Lee nodded again, slinking forward to the shape and kneeling next to it before waving Ellie over. Once Ellie was closer, she saw it was a dead Flag; his throat slit. 

"Dina did this?" Lee asked.

"Dina isn't a little girl anymore." Ellie whispered. 

Ellie pulled on the cabin door, the door giving way to a small wide open room. She began clearing the space before going up to the second floor. There she found a watchtower-esque setup; ammo and a table pulled close to the window. Ellie came closer to the window and figured out that it had a perfect vantage point of the back of the lodge, the tents, and the docks. The body outside must be the guard. Ellie quickly pulled herself up and then laid down on the table, folding out the stabilizer arms on her sniper rifle and looking through the scope. It wasn't very long before she saw Dina creeping along the side of the lodge towards the tents, holding something boxed shaped with wires sticking out.

"Lee." 

"Yeah." Lee responded. 

"Did you have bombs in the rowboat?"

"Yeah, a box bomb. Why?"

"Dina is taking it towards the tents." Ellie stated.

"Holy fuck."

"Lee, you need to go down there and cross toward the dock away from the tents. Hopefully she will cross there before entering the lodge. Grab her and get her to a boat on the dock and get back to your Mom's cabin; I'll follow. If she gets inside, follow her, I will watch your back with the sniper." Ellie said looking intently at Lee. "Do not fuck with Peter. We need to get Dina out of here."

"Ok."

"Lee." Ellie breathed. "Dina isn't herself right now. We have to get her to come back. I know what Talia's memory means to you but Dina's future is far more important."

"You're right." Lee said before touching Ellie's arm. "I'll go get her."

That's when the bomb exploded, shaking the two story cabin and bringing Ellie's eyes back to the scope. Flood lights suddenly turned on, illuminating the area better. Lee began running down the stairs, using the commotion coming from the camp as cover.

Ellie looked around, finding Dina crouched behind some boxes next to the lodge. The woman was clutching Ellie's hunting rifle and looking towards the tents. Ellie turned the scope that way, seeing fire and men running out toward the lodge. She turned back to Dina and that is when she saw him, the bored guard from the dock earlier. He was sneaking up behind her.

Ellie turned off the safety and put the man's head within her cross-hairs. She breathed in as her finger slowly pulled the trigger. The shot rang out, loud, as the man flew into the wall under the force of it. Ellie reloaded and refocused on Dina. The woman was looking in her direction, guilt washed over her features and it tugged at Ellie's chest.  _ You don’t have to do this, Dina.  _

Ellie felt like it was her fault Dina even considered this an option. Ellie had only known Dina as a level headed decision maker; a woman of high morals and fierce loyalty. But all the new information about Talia; it was more than enough for Ellie to want Peter dead. She could see why Dina grabbed at this chance; grief makes people do stupid things. Ellie couldn't let the trauma of this consume Dina. She knew all too well what was lost. 

She watched as Dina shot a Flag near the tents; this opened up Ellie to shoot a different Flag who was training his own gun on Dina. She reloaded, moving her focus to Lee who was struggling with a Flag on the dock. Lee pushed him backwards and Ellie shot, the man flew into the water. Ellie reloaded again, seeing Lee put a thumb into the air. 

Ellie then turned back to Dina, watching her shoot another Flag in the head. Dina crossed around the tents, looking for stragglers. As she moved, Ellie kept an eye on Dina’s blind spots; Protecting her movements. Dina crossed toward the dock as Ellie watched the Lodge double doors open and the man from the Jeep came running out. Before Ellie could shoot, the man was riddled with bullets, all coming from Lee’s smg. Dina turned, running over to Lee and Ellie watched the women duck behind a shored boat.

They were talking and Ellie could only see Lee's face barely.  _ Come on Lee, get her to the fucking boats. _ After a few moments, both women began reloading their weapons and Lee looked toward Ellie in the tower. Her face said it all; they were not going to the boats.

"Fucking hell." Ellie watched helplessly as the women crossed to the double doors. Dina opened them and the women snuck inside as Ellie watched the door close. Another Flag came sprinting around the corner before slowly sneaking toward the boat. Ellie turned, firing off another shot into the Flag. Finding herself overwhelmed and angry by the situation. Ellie then pulled her scope up to the balcony she had seen Peter standing on before, not seeing any movement or light. She brought her eyes from the scope and looked down, seeing Dina’s bracelet hanging loosely from her wrist. She needed to get down to the lodge. 

______________________________

Ellie heard her alarm go off; her eyes fluttered open, seeing a rather late 9:00 am looking back at her. She rubbed her eyes and felt a pain shoot through her right hand and looked at the bandage with frustration. It had been two full weeks since they had returned from Lake Jackson. The bullet had only grazed Ellie's hand; but healing was a lot slower for her this time. Ellie had barely left her house, instead choosing to sleep and read comic books. Anything to take her mind off of the events at the lake.

"Ellie?"

Ellie rolled in her bed looking towards her garage side door and seeing a figure outside.  _ Maria. _ The older woman was probably coming back for round ten. The woman had blamed Ellie for what happened; and yeah, if Ellie had acted more commanding, it might have gone differently. But it was exhausting listening to Maria say the obvious every other day. 

"It's open."

The door opened with a small creak and Maria calmly stepped inside before closing it behind her. 

"Come to yell at me some more?"

"No." Maria responded. "I came to ask about Tommy."

Ellie frowned in confusion before pulling herself up to a sitting position, crossing her legs underneath her body. "Is everything ok?"

"Do you think I was too hard on him?" Maria had crossed the room, grabbing Ellie's desk chair and rolling it close to the bed. 

"After Seattle?"

"Yeah." Maria sat, sighing and wringing her hands. Ellie had never seen the woman this vulnerable.

"Not really. We both made terrible decisions." Ellie responded, automatically thinking about Dina.

"I've always loved him." Maria began. "But I've never considered how hard Joel's death was on him."

"Why are you asking me?"

“Because you might have insight.” Maria sighed. “I just want to be done with it all and be with him again.”

“It’s not that easy though, is it?” Ellie was thinking about Dina, not Tommy. 

"Dina came by last night." Maria responded, like the older woman could read Ellie’s mind.

_ Dina. _ A flash of Ellie running across the lodge grounds, the cold of the double doors in her hands, throwing them open and hearing the gunshots coming from up the stairs. Ellie began breathing harder and Maria grabbed her lower leg, pulling her back into the present. 

"Are you ok, Ellie?"

"Yeah, sorry. Go on." Ellie tried to still her breathing.

"She and I talked most of the night." Maria squeezed Ellie's leg. "You need to talk to her."

"Not after what I did."

"Especially after what you did." Maria's voice became louder. 

“I can’t keep doing stupid things and expect Dina to forgive me!” Ellie yelled.

“You act like Dina hasn’t done anything wrong, Ellie. She told me everything last night. She put you in that situation. Why didn’t you tell me?” Maria sounded so pained.

“She did that out of grief; she wasn’t herself.”

"We all do stupid things out of grief. Especially now; in this world. I thought Tommy had become a cruel man- but he was just reacting to cruel circumstances. You deserve love, Ellie. Stop thinking everything you do is just another step into your own grave."

“I-” Ellie hung her head. “I don’t know.”

“I know.”

"Tommy loves you. And he really wants to make it right." Ellie broke the silence before looking at Maria.

"You love Dina." Maria responded. "Make it right."

Maria stood and walked to the door. "I'm going to talk with Tommy. Please do the right thing, Ellie."

Maria walked out, closing the door with a resounding click. Ellie hadn't spoken to Dina since the night in the lodge. But she felt an urge to at least see Dina's house, to maybe consider seeing Dina. 

"Maybe later." She lamented, laying back down in the bed. 

As she closed her eyes, she thought about the lodge. Her steps were loud as she ascended the stairs and followed the hallway to the room where the balcony connected. She had heard Lee's muffled voice; her rasped yelling. Ellie slowly opened the door inward, pushing her right gun into the room first. The loud pop and the searing burn in her hand were the last things she thought about as she drifted away; falling asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I plan on going camping with my wife this weekend. I will hopefully have the next chapter up by tomorrow; if not, Sunday or Monday.
> 
> Thanks for continuing to read. I love all the kudos and comments!
> 
> Remember to be easy on yourselves. Ellie never is but you should be. Grief and trauma are not always experienced in character and we are all human.


	12. Chapter 12

"Ellie!"

Ellie groaned and kept her eyes shut, pulling at her blanket.  _ I'm not getting up. _

_ " _ Ellie! It's five o'clock. PM. The afternoon."

"Fuck off." Ellie responded to the voice.

"Good try." Lee responded as she pulled the blanket off of Ellie from the foot of the bed.

Ellie's eyes shot open, her head throbbing from oversleep. "Lee. Why the fuck are you in my garage?"

"Because you haven't left it since we got back." Lee sat on the end of the bed. "And I'm tired of seeing my friend like this."

"We are not friends." Ellie groaned.

"Just because you broke my orbital bone?" Lee responded as she brought up a hand to her face. "On the contrary, my dear Ellie. That makes us, like, best friends."

Ellie grimaced as she pulled herself up to a sitting position, moving her pillows behind her for better support. "What do you want, Lee?"

Lee turned on the bed, pulling her legs under herself. Ellie got a better look at her face, Lee's left eye and cheek a mix of different shades of greens and purples. But her stupid, classic grin was still plastered across her face. Ellie thought about punching her again, but she wasn’t actually mad with the redhead. 

"I want my best friend to re-enter the world of the living."

"Then maybe you shouldn't have dragged me back down to Hell." Ellie responded, finally feeling the sleepy fog lift from her body.

"You are right. I am sorry." Lee sighed. "I did this to you. Which is why I am here to make it right. So, how can I help?"

Ellie didn't expect such an easy apology. To tell the truth, the reason Ellie was still punishing herself after Jackson Lake was because she enjoyed herself. She enjoyed stabbing Peter. She enjoyed watching the life leave his eyes, secretly wishing it was Abby. And the pain of the revelation has kept her from everyone; especially Dina. Dina would know. Dina could always see past all her bullshit.

"I am worried about you, Ellie." Lee moved to sit beside Ellie at the head of the bed. "Killing Peter set you back. By a lot."

"Well," Ellie responded flatly. "I told you to take Dina to the boats."

"You and I both know Dina was not going to those boats." Lee’s voice sounded exhausted, like she had been arguing this point for days.

Ellie closed her eyes. The searing pain of her hand from being shot came in slowly, the smell of gunpowder wafting under her nose. Ellie remembered every second of the confrontation in the lodge. After she was shot she stood slowly, opening the door with ease as she yelled into the room that she was unarmed. Acutely aware of the feeling that her switchblade made in her back pocket. As she opened the door, she saw Lee on her knees with both of her hands in the air. Ellie shot her own hands up, the feeling of her warm blood trickling down through the leather of Dina's bracelet and across her tattoo. The door continued to slowly open to Peter, holding Dina against himself, his handgun pressed into her head. Her eyes were full of fear and a tinge of regret.

"Ellie." Lee laid a hand onto her tattooed arm. "You can't keep punishing yourself."

Ellie was yanked into the present, the action pushing her to look into Lee's eyes. Ellie saw the same dread that she herself felt. Like Lee also replayed that night, every bad event in her life, over and over again. She was too hard on the woman. They were just two of the billions of warped creations of the cordyceps virus. 

"I am only good for one thing, Lee."

Lee tilted her head before understanding etched over her features. "Death?"

"Death."

"I don't know." Lee mused, turning her head away from Ellie. "This time, you weren't the only one around to see your actions."

Ellie felt confused. "What do you mean?"

"I saw." Lee breathed in deeply. "I made you go with me on my quest for vengeance because I thought you understood the importance of the journey. But, you acted only to protect Dina and I."

Ellie looked down at her hands. Her left one missing two fingers; her skin retaining the redness around the nubs. Her eyes moving to her right hand, the graze across the back of her hand still healing under the bandages. The bracelet. Dina's gift of luck. The chain that connected her to the woman she loved so deeply that she was willing to die in order to save her. To run into that building behind her.

The memory flooded back in silent motion, images shooting across her eyes. Peter yelled for Ellie to kneel or he would kill Dina. Ellie coolly asked Peter to let Dina and Lee go. Peter began screaming desperate words of a man backed into a corner, his army decimated by the women. She remembered making him a promise. Her words caused him to drop his gun and point it at Lee. His words were thick with hatred for the older woman; for what she did to his men over the years. Ellie crossed to Lee, pulling the redheaded woman to her feet. She balled up her right hand into a tight fist, feeling her warm blood squeeze between her fingers. She didn’t give Lee a chance to say anything before she swung. It landed square against Lee's cheek and eye, knocking the woman out cold. Ellie remembered her body hitting the floor, the thud resounded; its tone matching Dina's scream. 

"You didn't kill Abby. Not because you weren't physically able. But because you knew her death had no earthly gain. I think you figured out that Joel protected you in Salt Lake to give you a chance at life." Lee squeezed her arm.

"Lee-" Ellie warned. “What did I say-”

“I know the full story about you and Joel.” Lee interrupted. 

“Shit.” A single tear streamed from Ellie’s eyes, she used her arm to wipe it away quickly. 

"You are more like him than you realize. You offered yourself and the keys to Jackson to Peter to give Dina and I a chance at life; just like when Joel pulled you from that hospital." Lee's voice became strained. "You are not a killer. You are a protector."

Ellie didn't know what to say. Her chest felt like a weight was slowly being lifted, like her heart was a puzzle and all the pieces were slowly being put back together. 

"And now I am sitting here next to you, reminding you, that you still have a life to live in this world. Even if it seems like this world doesn't want to give it to you." Lee put her arm around Ellie, squeezing her into a hug. 

"I don't know." Was all Ellie could say.

"Dina does." Lee responded. 

Ellie turned, feeling like Lee could read her mind. "How am I going to fix that?"

"First you are going to shower." Lee chuckled. "You smell like an old world laundry mat."

Ellie laughed a full laugh.

"That is what I like to hear. Now, you go shower and I will make you dinner." 

"I don't have any food. And you can’t cook."

"Good thing I am super smart and work at a bar. I brought sandwiches from The Tipsy Bison. I was just gonna act like I made them." Lee teased, standing up from the bed and crossing to her bag. 

"If Seth made those, I am not eating them." Ellie quipped, walking to her dresser to pull out clean clothes.

"No, Maria made them. I didn't know that woman could do anything other than bark orders." Lee pulled the sandwiches out of her backpack and tossed them onto Ellie's coffee table. Then the redhead crossed to the door, grabbing her guitar which was leaning by the handle.

Ellie grabbed a towel and stuffed it under her arm with her clothes. As Ellie closed the bathroom door, she heard a slow strum emanate from her living room. Normally she found only annoyance in Lee's constant requirement to fill silence with music but today it was reassuring. Ellie stripped off her clothes, the movement of the process bringing the smell of a week of sleep to her nostrils.  _ I really do smell bad. _ Ellie looked up, catching a look at herself in the medicine cabinet’s worn out mirror. Her hair had grown so long but her depression made it greasy, stringy. Her face tired, her eyes were dark.  _ Lee is right. _

Ellie turned on the water, deciding to leave it cold. She needed the feeling of something different to shock her back to normal. Ellie wondered why she could never pull herself out of the hole of despair. Maybe Lee was right, she was just punishing herself for years of surviving. Maybe it was time to stop; it was time to move on. The cold water cascaded down her body, causing her to involuntarily tremble. She leaned into it, trying desperately to let it feel right.

Every time Ellie considered moving on, the image of Dina holding JJ on their farmhouse couch blossomed into her eyes. 

The smell of fresh baked challah; the taste of next day challah french toast with Dina laughing as she cut strawberries over Ellie’s plate. 

Dina slipping and falling face first as she chased their sheep; pulling Ellie down on top of her when she tried to pull her up.

The feeling of Dina’s form pressed against her body as they danced in the church; the first time she felt Dina's soft, warm lips against her own. 

Grabbing Dina from Peter and tossing her to the ground before bringing her switchblade into his temple. 

Dina's hands pulling at her shoulders as she repeatedly drove her blade into his chest. 

Dina's soft words as she held her on the floor afterwards. 

_ Yeah. It's time to fix this. _

Ellie turned off the water and stepped out to grab the towel. With every movement of the plush fabric across her skin, it felt like she was removing the cobwebs of her past. She dressed quickly in blue jeans and a short sleeved summer button up; the feeling of real clothes gave her confidence she forgot she had. Ellie took time to dry her hair with her towel before pulling the front strands back, freezing them in place with a hair tie. Ellie looked at herself for a few moments and she felt better. Ellie smiled at herself before turning to open the door and exiting the bathroom. Ellie glanced around but Lee was gone.

Ellie looked to the coffee table and saw a note leaned up against a beer and the sandwiches. On the couch was the guitar Joel had gifted Ellie; the moth looked almost shiny. She crossed, picking it up by the neck, feeling the new strings that were strung for left handed play. Ellie felt tears stream down her face. They were not tears of sadness but of relief. She crossed the room to put the guitar in her empty stand, the one she had been too scared to throw away. 

Ellie turned to see the note again, drawing her feet back to the couch. She grabbed the paper and sat down, seeing her name scribbled across the front. It wasn't in Dina's handwriting.

_ Ellie, _

_ I went back to the farmhouse to grab this beauty for you. Joel would want you to keep playing. He would want you to remember him. _

_ Thank you for helping me realize that Talia didn't need to be avenged. I finally figured out that she needed to be cherished. Dina will cherish you if you let her. _

_ Dina and I will be at the Bison tonight. Don’t miss out on the rest of your life. _

_ Lee _

Ellie smiled, placing the note back on her coffee table before opening the beer. Ellie took a long, slow swig. _Dina and I will be at the bison tonight._ _Dina._ Ellie placed the bottle back on the table. 

Ellie stood, fingering Dina's bracelet slowly. The leather no longer made her feel disconnected. 

“You’ve got this, Ellie.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only two more chapters left!
> 
> Hope everyone had a wonderful weekend! Thank you for all the kind comments and kudos!


	13. Chapter 13

A light breeze accompanied Ellie on her stroll to The Tipsy Bison. It kissed her neck as it passed through, allowing Ellie to calm her nerves as she followed the dusty street. Dusk was in full swing and most of the street lights were already illuminated as people stood outside, gently talking and laughing with one another. As Ellie closed in on the bar, she could hear the telltale strumming and rasp of Lee performing an old Hank Williams song. 

Normally Ellie would be nervous but tonight felt like the beginning of a new phase; she fingered the bracelet in excited anticipation of what was to come. A group of patrolmen waved and smiled at Ellie and she returned the favor. The scent of summer, beer, and beef wafted around as Ellie drew closer to the bar. Maria opened the door to the Bison and met Ellie's eyes, a soft smile.

"You look good." Maria commented. “Nice to see you among the living.”

"Thanks. Is Dina inside?" Ellie responded, passing Maria to enter the loud bar. 

"Of course she is. Far side, back corner booth." Maria said happily. "I'll see you later."

Ellie nodded before turning into the bar, the door slamming behind her. She scanned her eyes around, finding the Bison to be almost too busy. It was like everyone in town decided tonight was more of a Friday than a Wednesday. Ellie walked up to the bar and waved at Vicki, Seth's daughter, before placing her hands palm down on the bar. 

"Two whiskeys, neat."

Vicki nodded and plopped two glasses down before pouring. “Nice to see you, El.” Vicki was very heavy handed with the pour. "Doubles. Seth ain't here and it's on the house."

"Thank you." Ellie said as she grabbed the glasses, tilting her head towards the stage where Lee was finishing  _ I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry _ . Lee nodded at Ellie with a sly grin on her face. Ellie nodded back, watching the Red Head grab her capo and begin to tune her guitar.  _ It's now or never.  _ Lee began talking to the crowd but Ellie could care less what the woman was saying, she was singularly focused.

Ellie took a sip of one of the glasses, feeling fire as the liquid disappeared down her throat. She turned and walked to the far corner, pushing herself through the bodies to see Dina sitting in the back booth up against the wall, gripping a bottle of beer. Dina was peeling the label, unaware of her surroundings.  _ Dina. _ Ellie smiled and moved close to the table, depositing the drinks on to it before grabbing the bottle from Dina's hands. Ellie could tell it was full, she laughed as Dina's eyes slowly moved up her form to meet her own. Almost shocked that Ellie was standing in front of her.

"Your beer has gone warm." Ellie said, depositing the bottle on to the top of the booth. "Whiskey. Neat. Just like you like it."

Dina just looked at her, confusion etched across her soft features. “Whiskey. Uh- What?”

“Neat.” Ellie confidently grabbed one of Dina's hands, pulling the woman to her feet. 

Ellie took a slight step back, taking in Dina's form. Dina had her hair up in her classic ponytail, a flowy purple blouse, tight dark blue jeans, and cute dark boots. Ellie felt a fire form in her belly, she knew that she needed to talk to the woman, to tell her everything. But maybe tonight needed to be about something else; a different kind of everything.

"You look breathtaking." 

Dina's face began to redden slightly, her eyes looking down before a small smile crept on to her lips. "Who are you and what did you do with Ellie?"

Ellie's thumb began caressing Dina's palm, causing a small gasp and a shy turn of the brunette’s head. Ellie felt her heart begin to beat faster as she stepped closer to Dina, almost touching their bodies together.

The two women stood there silently, both breathing in each other's air. Dina shifted back towards the wall before she spoke, "Where have you been, asshole?"

Dina was trying to be angry, trying to take control of the situation. But both women knew who was in control. Ellie moved closer, almost bringing their bodies together. 

"Had some stuff to take care of." She brought a hand to her temple. "In here."

"Ok." Dina was trying to keep her voice even, the closeness of their bodies obviously affecting her. "What now?"

"I have something more important to take care of." Ellie swallowed, feeling her throat tighten. She then brought up two fingers and pressed them to Dina's chest. "In here."

Ellie and Dina's eyes met. Ellie saw her brown eyes darken under her gaze, causing her breath to hitch. Dina brought her own hand up to press Ellie's down over her heart. Ellie could feel Dina's heart beat, fast and unyielding. As the women held each other's gaze, a thumping beat began from the stage. Lee's foot was stomping as she finger picked out an accompanying tune on her acoustic guitar. The music gave Ellie more confidence and she leaned in closer.

**Listen to the wind blow, watch the sun rise**

**Running in the shadows, damn your love, damn your lies**

“Let’s talk later.” Ellie breathed, her voice dripping with desire.

Ellie squeezed Dina's hand and moved her hand to Dina's back, pulling the woman closer. "May I?" Ellie rubbed the small of her back, causing Dina to roll her hips slightly.

"Yes." Dina squeaked.

Ellie pulled Dina in fully, their bodies flush, a moan involuntarily escaped Ellie's mouth as she gazed down to Dina. 

"I want to kiss you so badly."

**And if, you don't love me now**

**You will never love me again**

"I don't know if that is a good idea." Dina whispered, her breathing labored.

"Why?"

**I can still hear you saying**

**You would never break the chain**

"We have so much to discuss-"

“Wait-” Ellie leaned in interrupting her, looking down at Dina's lips before biting her own. 

**And if you don't love me now**

**You will never love me again**

"We can discuss it later. Right now, I am ready to make this right."

Dina leaned her forehead against Ellie, letting out a ragged breath.

"If you will have me." Ellie muttered.

**I can still hear you saying**

**You would never break the chain**

Dina quickly grabbed Ellie's shirt pulling their bodies against the wall before crashing her lips against Ellie's. Ellie groaned at the softness and the hunger that Dina was displaying. All worry left her mind as she deepened the kiss, moving her tongue across Dina's lips requesting access.

**Listen to the wind blow, down comes the night**

**Running in the shadows, damn your love, damn your lies**

**Break the silence, damn the dark, damn the light**

Ellie's hands found purchase on Dina's sides, rubbing all around in an attempt to re-memorize each soft curve. Dina pulled Ellie in more, rotating her hips against Ellie's while their lips fought for dominance. The kiss was heated, hungry, and the women could care less that they were in a crowded bar in Jackson.

**And if you don't love me now**

**You will never love me again**

**I can still hear you saying**

**You would never break the chain**

Ellie felt Dina's hands move above her belt buckle, her fingers dancing lightly at the skin there before spreading out over her bare abdomen. The action made heat shoot between her legs and Ellie broke the kiss, breathing heavily into Dina's mouth as they leaned their foreheads together. A futile attempt at staying upright.

Ellie grabbed Dina's wrists and pulled her hands out from under her shirt. She moved her head back, her eyes meeting Dina's. Dina's were so dark with desire that it sent shivers down her back.  _ We need to leave. Now. _

"Do you want-"

"Yes." Dina leaned into Ellie, her mouth dangerously close to Ellie's ear. "I want you to make love to me. Now."

"Fuck." Ellie felt like her body was on fire.

Ellie grabbed Dina's hand and tugged. No one seemed to be paying attention as Ellie glanced around. There were so many people to push through and the idea of being stopped was not on the table right now. She saw the back door behind the bar and pulled Dina in that direction. She'd apologize to Vicki later, her mind instead focused on the woman behind her. 

The women stumbled through the small kitchen before Ellie dropped Dina's hand as she reached the alley door, pushing it with a heavy shove and stumbling into the dark. She passed the dumpster before turning to see if Dina was still following. As her body turned, she felt Dina’s hands grab her collar, pushing her against the building. The air was thick with desire as Dina's lips met Ellie's. 

"You better-" Dina groaned between kisses. "Never leave me again."

The beat of the song still coming from the Tipsy Bison was loud in Ellie's head as she pulled away from Dina. 

"Not a chance."

________________________________

  
  


Ellie had forgotten the feeling of Dina’s naked body curled into her. It felt so good, so right, that Ellie felt guilty for forgetting it. She glanced down at the brunette who was gently sleeping on her chest.  _ What time is it? _ The night had gotten away from them and Ellie wondered where JJ was. Dina stirred at that moment, nuzzling her head further into Ellie’s chest with a contented moan.

“Hi.”

Ellie smiled. “Hi.”

“What time is it?”

Ellie turned to look at her bedside table. “Two in the morning. Where is JJ?”

“Jesse’s parents; they have family visiting from Denver. They wanted him to be around for the reunion.” Dina nuzzled in further.

“That’s great for JJ. I am glad he has his grandparents.” Ellie lamented.

“I’m glad he has his mother back.” Dina said, her voice even.

“Tonight-” Ellie began. “Tonight was amazing but-”

Dina rolled off of Ellie quickly, the loss of her warmth sent a chill down Ellie’s spine. 

“But you can’t stay.” Dina closed her eyes.

“No, I can stay.” Ellie rolled, pulling the woman in close. “I was going to say that we needed to talk.”

“Oh.” Dina laughed. “Sorry. I just don’t know what to think anymore.”

“No, I should be sorry. I am the one who has been sending out mixed signals.” Ellie grabbed one of Dina’s hands and pulled it up to her mouth, kissing the back of it lightly. “However, I hope what we did for the last couple hours was perfectly clear.”

“Oh it was. Crystal clear.” Dina grinned as she leaned in, pressing her lips against Ellie’s.

Their kiss was soft and slow, a gentle exploration of a favorite place long forgotten. Ellie’s hands explored Dina’s back, leaving goosebumps in her wake. The women pulled away, knowing that they would lose the moment if they continued.

“That was definitely better than a six.” Ellie stated, reaching to tuck a stray strand of hair behind Dina’s ear.

“Can I tell you a secret?” Dina asked, pushing Ellie onto her back so she could lay on her head on her chest again.

“Always.”

“Our first kiss- in the church.” Dina began.

“I remember.”

“I was only able to kiss you because of the whiskey. I was so fucking scared.”

Ellie pushed air out of her nose in disbelief, feeling warmth in her heart.

“I had liked you, was attracted to you, for years Ellie; I just didn’t know what it was. What those feelings meant.” Dina sighed. “When I finally kissed you-- it was like an explosion went off in my body. And I never want to kiss anyone else again.”

“It’s mutual.” Ellie chuckled. “I kept my feelings hidden because I didn’t want to ruin our friendship.”

“It was a ten.” Dina moved her head up to lightly kiss Ellie’s neck. “They have all been tens.”

Ellie felt her heart swell as a tear began to roll down her cheek. “I’m sorry I left, Dina.”

“I’m sorry I took the rowboat.”

“Do you think-” Ellie sniffled, trying to stop more tears from flowing. “We can fix this?”

Dina turned to look at Ellie before scooting up, their faces becoming level.

“I can’t see my future without you.”

“Thank god.” Ellie replied. “Otherwise I may end up living in Maria’s garage forever.”

“Who’s to say you won’t? I mean, as you said, Lee does live in my house.” Dina laughed. “You can be my mistress.”

Ellie rolled her eyes before pushing Dina playfully. “Not funny.”

“Teasing you is always funny.” Dina was grinning from ear to ear, the energy of it all swirling around.

"I love you, Dina."

"And I love you too, Ellie."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "The Chain" by Fleetwood Mac
> 
> Mention of "I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry" by Hank Williams.
> 
> Next week is the epilogue. Thank you all for sticking around and supporting this fic. My love is overflowing for you all.


	14. Epilogue

"We are coming in! Y'all better be clothed, ya' hear!"

Lee stepped into the new house, a four year old JJ propped on her shoulders, and one of her hands over her eyes. JJ was giggling and it was sweet music to Ellie's ears. She was holding a box of comics and placed them down near the stairs before crossing the living room to meet them.

"We've been working Lee." Ellie scolded before reaching for her son. "Come here spud, did you have a good night with aunt Lee?"

"Yeah!" JJ yelled. "We saw dinosaurs!"

Ellie glanced at the redhead before looking at JJ, "Momma loves dinosaurs!"

"I know, aunty Lee told me. And Mommy, she told me too." JJ began. "I want a dinosaur, can we get one?"

"Dinosaurs are dangerous." Dina interjected, coming down the stairs. "Besides, your Momma would spend all her time with the dinosaur instead of you."

"Well. I already got you one, buddy." Lee laughed, reaching into her backpack and pulling out a plastic t-rex. "Keep it safe from your Momma. She may steal it."

JJ grabbed for the toy and wobbled to get down. Ellie laughed, placing the boy down on to his feet and watching him run to the couch in order to inspect his prize.

"So is it pick on Ellie day, or what?" Ellie asked incredulously, looking from Lee to Dina. 

Dina laughed softly before walking up behind Ellie, wrapping her arms around her waist and leaning her head onto her back. 

"If you weren't such easy pickings-" 

"Dina!" Lee mocked. "Don't let her know our secret."

"Sorry," Dina mused. "But you know I am terrible at keeping secrets from her."

Ellie smiled warmly. The exchange made her feel at peace. She looked around at the new house, it was recently constructed by members of the town on the outskirts near the far wall. Ellie had worked her ass off to get this house for the past two years, hoping to make up for ruining Dina's dreams before. 

"You really did it." Lee said suddenly. "You got a new house."

"Nope," Ellie said, turning to Dina to look in her eyes. "We did it."

"You're damn right." Dina smiled before kissing Ellie deeply.

"Alright lovebirds, I'm out." Lee said as she crossed back to the door. "Just wanted to drop off the stinker."

"We will see you at the Tipsy Bison on Friday?" Dina called out.

"You know it." Lee waved. "Later."

"She can never just hang out, can she?" Dina said sadly, before turning to go sit next to JJ.

"She will," Ellie said. "When she is ready."

"It has been a long road."

"But it was worth it." Ellie said as she looked at Dina then JJ. Her eyes looked around at the moving boxes and fresh wood paneling. "It was all worth it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading my story. I appreciate and love you all for it.
> 
> If you have any recommendations, please send them my way. 
> 
> Thank you for all the kudos and comments. I love reading them.


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